bluenature

23 December

2009-12-23T21:51:00.002+08:00

Two days to Christmas!!!! Yah! It will be a break for me from work, and I am looking forward to it. I think during this long weekend I want to catch a few movies - 3D Avatar, Chipmunks 2 and Sherlock Homes. I am not sure whether am I able to catch all 3 movies, but I hope to catch one of it. These few days work is kind of slow because it is a festive season, and it is the year end period. Therefore, I am able to go home early which also means that less overtime. However, I need to prepare myself for the next year because I guess that will be the time when things start picking up. This means that I may need to work overtime, but I really hope that I can end work on time everyday. I also hope that the company will pay me better or even pay me overtime as I feel that I am being taken advantage. I feel that I am working for free every time when I need to work overtime. I also feel that I am terribly underpaid because I am holding a Degree, and with a peanut salary I have such a heavy work load. I feel that they should employ someone with a Diploma instead as the other 2 persons who are in the same position as me are Diploma holders. I'm not asking for much, but at least be fair to me by giving me a comparable salary to my Degree. ><

Through my observation of this company, I find that the turnover of my position is the highest because the 3 of us are all hired this year. Furthermore, the work load is quite heavy. I am not surprise of the high turnover rate because the position that I am in does not have good benefits. There is no pay or off in lieu for overtime, and the expectations are high. Seems like not many have worked pass 2 years in this position. One of the biggest reason is lots of personal time is sacrifice - meaning no time for family, friends and self. This kind of work life does not seems healthy to me in a way. I think something should be done, but I have no power because I am just a small 'prawn' in this company.

21 December

2009-12-21T21:12:00.002+08:00

4 more days to Christmas! Wondering why am I looking forward to this day? The answer is because it is a public holiday, and I do not need to go to work. Yah! Entering the work force once again has made me missed the days in school. The carefree life is what I missed the most as no one will stick their nose into the things I do. I will describe a work life as a serving a sentence in jail, but it is a paid jail term because people are monitoring the things you do. In addition, one can't do what they want or leave at the time they desire. Everything that you do needs to go through the hierarchical sequencing before it is approved. And this includes applying for a day's leave. Since I'm at this topic, it strikes me that from the day we are born we are being controlled. When we were younger, parents or elders are there to tell us what we can or can't do. Then as we grow up, school's rules and class's rules are the ones that control our actions. It seems like no matter at what age we are in, our actions are always been watched by others. Seems like a sad thing to you? To me, it is kind of sad because there is no real freedom.

Doubts exist in everyone of us. The job that I'm in has made me question myself numerous times - "Am I suitable for this job?" "Is this what I really want?" "What is the thing I really want in life?" " What kind of job do I really want?" Till now, I have not found the answer to all my questions. However, I do firmly know that this is not the kind of job I wanted. I want something where my time is flexible, enabling me to write & take beautiful photos of the things I experience and allowing me to travel to different places to share with people the cultures of the countries. I am the type of person who wants to experience cultures, places and food with my senses. Will I ever get this kind of job? I am not sure about it, but I believe that what I want I will achieve it in the end. :)

11 December

2009-12-11T21:53:00.003+08:00

Third week of work, and I have fallen sick. I can't imagine this is happening. Have I been working too hard or have I been taking too many 'heaty' stuff? I do not have the answer to this either. I started by having sore throat on Tuesday followed by flu and cough the next day. I have not seen a doctor yet because I want to complete the three days of general orientation which started on Wednesday. I think if I am not well on Monday I will be taking medical leave. However, it is very unfortunate that the company will take it as an unpaid leave because I am not a confirmed staff. Since I am on this topic of work, this whole week I have been working overtime. The only day I am home early is today as I ended work at 7pm plus. Even though I am sick, I have been working overtime as well because I need to help clear some work. The best part for this is I am not paid for doing overtime. To think of it now, I am kind of being taken advantage, and am doing free labour after my office hour. Haiz..... Just three weeks of work, and I have seen the ugliest side of this department I am working in. I really can't imagine how long am I able to stay in this job. Even though many are envious that I have gotten into this hotel, but it is not as good as it seems. Being in this hotel can be associated with a SIA stewardess who is seen by many as glamorous, but it is not that true after at all.

30 November

2009-11-30T21:18:00.002+08:00

Time flies fast, and it is already the last day of November. This is my fifth day at work, and it is also a day closer to the end of my honeymoon period. I have not really had a feel of the real tasks that I'm supposed to do yet. However, I guess that after the honeymoon period I will then have a feel of the real things. Currently, I am being attached at different departments to understand how they operate and how the department is linked to mine. It is kind of interesting to understand how a hotel actually operates. The appearance of a hotel may look very glamorous, and if you think that the people working inside are cool then you are wrong. This is because what runs on the inside is not reflected on the exterior. Many sweats, hard works, coordinations, etc are required to build the image and service standards of the hotel. This really gives me an insider into the hotel industry. The orientation also gives me the privileges to visit the different rooms and suites which are really beautiful. From the past days of orientation, I can now understand the effort that is put into maintaining the image of this hotel.

28 November

2009-11-28T16:42:00.006+08:00

Recently, changes have been quite drastic after I started working on Monday. Adaptation to the new environment, new job scopes, new people, new working styles, etc. Although I am still going through orientation, I can feel the pressure and stress even before I started doing my actual tasks. This is because of the department that I am in - the sales department. This job is fast pace and requires great amount of accuracy. I hope I will be able to meet their work standards and the pace. During the days I have been at work, I missed my first permanent job because it gives me freedom and space to breathe. My position for this current job is as a sales administrator where I am help the sales people to do proposals, contracts,etc. It is really an admin base job as I will be in the office 95% of the time, and sitting in front of the computer. The worst thing is that I am not allowed to use the Internet unless it is work-related. I am not sure how will I survive, and how long I can stay in this job because I am not really the kind who likes to be in a office for a long time. This could be because of the first job I had which allows me to roam around. I am really missing it now while I am typing this. My first job was as a QA technician grants me access into the production area. I roamed around the production area a lot because there were materials that needed checking, and I was also in-charge of pest control which grants me a few hours to walk around the whole factory once every two weeks. It was great especially when I needed to take a breather during work. However, this current job makes me doubt I can do such things. Somehow, I feel that I am being caged in, and have no place to escape. I am not sure why I am feeling this way, but this is how I feel. This is my first permanent job after my degree; however, this is not the job I wanted. Under this current situation, I guess I have no choice, but to accept and stay in this job in the mean time. Where I will be or what lies ahead for me is still be a mystery to me at the moment. Now, the main thing is doing my job well and meeting up to my superiors' expectations. I hope my boss, superiors and colleagues will treat me with patience, and be good & well to me. I think this is what I can ask for now.

11 November

2009-11-11T15:49:00.002+08:00

Hahaha......I know it has been long since I last updated my blog. Today, I'm kind of free to write so here goes. :)

The few months I was working as a temp. The job was rather admin based, and was working for a VWO(Voluntary Welfare Organization). They run courses so I was there to help in the back-end work. I think the only job scope I enjoyed doing was getting refreshments for the participants as that was the only time where I can go out during office hours, and not sit in front of my computer. After my temp job ends, I continued to keep myself busy with the volunteering work at APEC during the Leaders' Week. This is currently till on-going, and my duty will end this Friday. These two weeks I having been waking up very early because of the event as I have chosen the morning shift which is the 8am timing. But because I need to get the security pass, I have to reach there even earlier. So for the past 5 days I have been waking up at 5.15am so that I can get there by 7am to get the security pass. I was tired out on the first day because there was lots of walking to do, and because of this my legs' muscle were very sore. However, I have to admit that it is a good exercise because many of us were literally walking and standing for long hours. What is next after this volunteering work? I am not very sure yet, but I will definitely continue looking for jobs. During the time between after this Friday to being offered a job, I guess I will treat it as a resting period for me so that I can be ready for the next challenge ahead of me.

I need to tell myself to stay positive and think positive........

18 September 2009

2009-09-18T21:54:00.003+08:00

Today isn't a happy day for me. I have received 2 bad news. One is I wasn't selected for a job, and the other one is I went for a job interview today which the interviewers' body language is telling me that I'm not the person that they were looking for. Haiz.....what is happening? Must I really go back to the food science industry? If I go back to my previous industry, all these 3 years of study in obtaining a Communications degree will be wasted. I don't want this to happen. I am only asking for a chance to allow me to either work in the PR, Marcom or events. Is that so difficult? Is it because my character doesn't suit these industries? I know my weaknesses, but why can't these companies give me a chance to prove myself? From the day I ended my exams, I have sent out an estimated 100-200plus resumes. Why aren't there more interviews? Why aren't there any offers given to me? I am really puzzled. Is the problem on me or what? I am somewhat frustrated because it has been so many months. Where is that job?!

7 September 2009

2009-09-07T15:06:00.002+08:00

I am now blogging instead of working because currently I have finished all the work that were given to me. Blogging secretly is challenging because I am trying not to be caught red-handed. I find that office work is the most boring and the most difficult to kill time especially when I have finished the things on hand. The other reason I dare to blog is because my direct boss is on leave today so the eyes are not behind me. Life here is incomparable to the days in Pokka because I was able to move around the production floor. It is easier to kill time there than here. Luckily this job is a temp job which will end on 2nd October. I really can't imagine working here all my life. Haiz....I need a permanent job which is more exciting and fun. A job which enable me to move around or goes out or travel out of Singapore.
Recently, I am lost again. I seems to have difficulty finding the real me, and I am not sure what I want in life. I can't see what is in front of me. I can only see that its pitch black. I really need to get away from my family, friends and Singapore. I am not being selfish, but I really need to get away from all these for a period of time to find myself and to know what I want in life. This feeling is back once again. The feeling of leaving everything here to go elsewhere to take a break and spend some quality time alone. I guess this is because I have been portraying different me with different group of people till I'm kind of lost. I feel that I have given lots of myself to others but not to myself yet. I need to spend some time with myself, and to do this the best way is to get away from here for a period of time.
There is this chinese saying "If you are successful in your career, you may not be successful in your love life." And vice verse. Hmmm....how true is this? I believe that there are people who can achieve success in both their love life and work life. Currently, I haven't achieve these two things yet. I haven't got a permanent job, and that special someone hasn't appear in my life yet. However, I believe they will appear soon especially for the career part. I believe that I will be offer a job that I like anytime now. I am not sure why I am so certain about it, but my feelings tell me so. No matter what happens, I must stay positive and stay positive.

Wei Si, jia you!!!

1st September

2009-09-01T22:23:00.002+08:00

It has been long since I have updated. The reason for not updating my blog is because I'm lazy. I have been working as a temp program assistant for nearly a month now. I'm still learning and getting use to it. But recently, I have been making way too many mistakes. I am not sure what got into me, I don't make mistakes that frequent and this is a very rare. Work is still ok, but I find that it is quite boring because most of the time I'm bound to my desk. I think I not use to sitting at my desk 90% of my time. I still prefer jobs that requires me to move around. I WANT MY DREAM JOB! haha.....
I am still looking for a full-time job even though I'm working as a temp now. This working life really need time to get use to because I have not been in the working world for the last 3 years. I feel my freedom is suddenly being deprived of because now around 80% of my waking hours are at work. Haiz....now I yearn to go back to the lifestyle that I had during the holidays. I know I can't do that unless I can find someone rich to provide for me. haha....I think I am day-dreaming or maybe a sign for me to go to bed. I will update more when I can.

28/6/09

2009-06-28T18:22:00.003+08:00

The end of June is here. Another few more days it will be the start of July. My convocation is near and that means I will be an official graduate. I went to collect my academic regalia on Monday with my mum. I think my parents are happy and sad at the same time. The happy part would be that I am graduating, and the sad part is I'm still jobless. We will be having studio photo taking at Serangoon Broadway, but it will only happen after my sister graduates. That would take place in 2-3 years time. I choose to wait for my sister to graduate because that would save us money for taking the photos twice. We are planing to have our photos taken with our grandma as she was the one who looked after us when my parents are working. I think we will be taking a few photos at Serangoon Broadway when my sister graduates. Individual portraits of my sis and me, a family portrait(4 of us), a family portrait with my grandma, and a portrait of my grandma, sister and me. I hope that if possible I would want a portrait of my sister and me as well. Serangoon Broadway will be happy as they will be earning a lot from us since we will be taking quite a few photos. I suppose at that time my wallet will be bleeding as these photos would cost a lot. When I get a job, I must save a part of my salary for the photos as well.

25/6/09

2009-06-25T16:00:00.002+08:00

Staying at home has been the best way to pass my days. The reason for me to say this is because going out means spending money. In order to minimize my spending, I choose to go out once a fortnight or even longer. This way, I do not need to ask money from my parents. To live more economically these days, I started going to the library to borrow storybooks, eat 98% of my meals at home, etc. I have successfully turned myself into a homely gal. I don't know whether this is a good sign or a bad one. At times, I do yearn to go out with my friends or to watch a movie or to have a nice cup of coffee. I resisted as now I am officially categorized under unemployment status. To curb those temptations, I will normally go down for a walk around my neighborhood. The walk does helps me a lot as it helps me to take my mind off those thoughts. I know this is a transition period, but it is unknown to me how long this period will last to officially announce that I am financially independent. I really can't wait to that day to arrive because it is not that good to be still dependent on my parents. I would like to lighten my parents' financial load soon. To achieve that I need a full-time job. However, I have to be patient about getting a job because fate and luck play a part in the process.

16/6/09

2009-06-16T17:36:00.002+08:00

Today is just like any other days. I received a wedding invitation from my secondary school friends. Both husband and wife were my classmates for five years. I will be attending their wedding dinner in July at Swissotel Merchant Court. Since I'm on this topic, this year I will be attending 2 friends' wedding - one in July and another in August. This will burn a hole in my pocket. Haiz....now already so broke :( But what choice do I have. The worst one would be my graduation that will be at 10 July. I thought the tea and tickets to attend the ceremony should be free,but SIM is getting money out of us - $16 for an adult which includes tea. I will be getting 4 tickets for my family - dad, mum, sis and my grandma. I will not be graduating with an honours because my GPA is short of 0.6 to get a 3rd degree honour. I am kind of sad, but there is nothing I could do. Anyway in the working world, grades don't really matter as the only thing which matter is the work performance (this is true and I am consoling myself). I had worked 21months before I entering the education system again. Once I became an employee there, everything had to be re-learned as there is a vast difference between what is taught at school, and how things are done in the real world.
My job searching is still on the go. Seems like with this bad economy downturn which hit last year, jobs are becoming less and unemployment are increasing. I heard from my dad that a cousin of mine had been retrenched recently. So I think if I still can't find a job after my convocation, I will have to resort to temporary or contract jobs first.

updates-10/6/09

2009-06-10T14:04:00.002+08:00

I forgot when I last blogged. Hmmm....I think is last week, and I'm lazy to check my past postings. Things that I'm doing now and before is still the same except that I'm now learning Spanish. I'm not learning at a language school, but am doing self-learning. This does occupies some of my time. As for job interviews, I haven't receive any after the one from Ya Kun. Even though I'm a little anxious and down about it, I know that certain things can't be force. People around me have been asking me to take it easy, but still as a human being, one tends to worry about it. Is it luck or fate that is playing with me? I'm not sure. Or is it that I am not good enough for them? Or is there somewhere in my cover letter or resume that went wrong? Not sure about it as well. I have sent out around 60 plus cover letters with resumes, but only one got back (which is Ya Kun). However, these companies that I sent out to consist of some which are employing and some which I am just interested to work in. The news is saying that the unemployment rate is decreasing, and more companies are employing. Hmmm.....I think is true to some extend because some of my schoolmates are employed. How many percent of them are employed? I'm not sure, but I believe they are going for interviews. I think that no one is going through like what I am going through now or worst. Haiz.....I know I should look on the bright side, but I can't help it. It is like luck is not on my side or fate is playing a joke on me. I am trying to be as positive as I can facing the current situation, but I don't think you can blame me for having negative feelings. If you were in my shoes, I think you may be feeling the same as well.

2nd june

2009-06-02T09:50:00.002+08:00

Time flies fast. We are in the month of June. Another few more days will be my mother's birthday. Today will be going out to celebrate Liyana's birthday. Her actual day was yesterday, but the star wasn't free. So we have to push it backwards a day later. We will be going to Sofra Turish Resturant and Cafe for lunch. I found that many good comments were given to this place on the Internet, and the price is at affordable range. I think those who read my blog can check it out. It is at Shaw Tower (the one near Bugis Junction). These recent days I have not being doing much, just the ususal which is facebook-ing, check out for jobs, reading storybooks, playing badminton, slacking at home and going out once in a while with my sister(who is currently having holidays) and friends. To be truthful, after spending a month like this is kind of boring. Haiz....not sure how long will I have to continue this kind of life, but I am appreciating it at the moment and enjoying while I can. In the meantime, I better go and get ready otherwise I will be late.

Updates

2009-05-28T17:35:00.003+08:00

I have not been blogging that often when compared to the past weeks. A week plus since I had last blogged. I have not been doing much for the past one week plus. I had re-write my cover letter and made some changes to my resume. I had also resend my cover letter and resumes to companies that I am keen to work for. Monday, I got a called from a company which I send my resume to and went for the interview on Tuesday. I felt that I had not answer the questions well and some were off the point. I am not sure will I be called for a second interview from this company as I did not receive any call or email from them. Last Tuesday, I went to a talk at Temask Polytechnic with Priyanka which was by Resorts World Sentosa. After the talk, it made me more interested to join the hospitality industry even more as either a public relations executive, marketing communications executive or marketing executive. I had been interested in the hospitality industry when I was in polytechnic especially the F&B. I don't know why I had this interest or when I had developed it. I just find this industry interesting because one get to meet different people from all walks of life, face different challenges each day and a career which have great sense of achievements. I am not sure whether am I right or am I wrong or even how I know about it since I have not worked in this industry. But the thing is I just know it. I have sent my cover letter and resume to Resorts World Sentosa and Marina Bay Sands. I have no news from them yet, but I hope that they will call me soon to ask me to go for an interview. I also am hoping that the other companies that I sent my resume to will call me soon.

Please, give me lots of good lucks. I am not asking for much, just a good job with reasonable remunerations from a good company with good boss, good superior and good collegues. Am I asking too much?

Can't Understand

2009-05-19T08:41:00.003+08:00

I really can't understand why those companies that recently wanted an interview with me are those from either insurance or have some problems with it. The problems I meant were being fishy about what they are really doing or are unethical in some ways. I met with two companies which were like that while I checked on the Internet about them. I believe if the companies are transparent, people won't talk bad about them in forums. Am I unlucky or what? I just want to find a job that will not ask me to do things that are unethical or have a company claim to be something but turns out to be another. This is rather frustrating. I am already not looking at sales because I don't like it, and now these kind of companies are popping up. Internet is a very accessible media, if there is something bad about the company it can spread like wild fire. As people can be anonymous, they can tell the truth without the fear of dangers or threats.

I am not asking a lot, but a decent job with a good company, a good superior and good colleagues. Why is this so hard to ask for? I hope good luck will come to me soon to find a good job in a good company with a good superior and good colleagues.

Still haven't got a job

2009-05-13T15:22:00.002+08:00

Sent out so many resumes, and is still sending resumes everyday to different companies. No answers, replies or calls were made to ask me to go for interviews. My cousin who studied in NUS and is graduating at the same time as me has job offerings made to him. Haiz....where did it go wrong? Why hasn't any companies that I sent my resumes to called? Why aren't these companies giving chances? Is it because I am graduated with a US degree and they don't really recognized it? It can't be because University at Buffalo had partner with SIM so it should be a recognizes degree. What happened? If you think that I am desperate to get a job, the answer is yes and no.

Yes, becasue I don't want let people think I live off my parents and I am kind of bored. No, because this break will not come by again when I work so I do want to cherish it. When work starts, I won't be able to live like that until I retired at 60 years old. But I do hope to go for interviews which is not happening now because I don't know what happen or is there somewhere that has gone wrong.

Companies that I sent out resumes to could you call me to go for interviews.......

Memories of last year at this time

2009-05-11T17:49:00.002+08:00

Last year around this time, I was in Japan with my family. The places and food in Japan were great, and we promised to return this year. However, because of the bad economy crisis we were unable to visit Japan this year. Last year, we were at the main island of Japan and we had visited Osaka, Kyoto, Mount Fuji and Tokyo. There were many more, but base on my memory now I could not recall further. We had also visited Universal Studio and Disneyland. The trip was fun, and interesting because it was a great way to see how people in Japan live and to understand their culture. Even though Japan is a country which has advanced in many ways compared to the other countries in Asia, the people of Japan still keeps its traditions at heart. The trip was a memorable one because we saw snow on Mount Fuji, Autumn maple leaves at the inn that we stayed at which was at the foot of Mount Fuji and the cherry blossoms. A sight of three different seasons were rare, but we saw it. Japan is undeniable a clear country, there is no sight of rubbish on the roads or paths. The toilet seats are the most memorable one because there are so many buttons with different functions. We wanted to go to Hokkaido this year, but the current situation had let us forgo this trip. I want to visit this country again, and to walk around Tokyo because the stay was very short when we visited Tokyo the last time. I want to go back to Japan again....... I hope to have the chance to visit every countries before the time I have on this Earth is up.

Vesak Day

2009-05-09T22:12:00.003+08:00

This public holiday does not seems like a holiday to me because the things that I am doing today is similar to what I had done for the past few weeks. Vesak Day is a big and important day for many Buddhists. I went to the temple with my family to do prayers, and to give the Buddha statue a bath. After the visit to the temple, I was doing the same things as before. But today, I took a short nap and finished the second book that I borrowed from the library. I don't really know how long more will I have to continue this lifestyle because I think I am somewhat sick of it. However, I know that when I start working I will be complaining about work life again. I think I must be more appreciative of the life that I am living now, and stop complaining how dull or bleak my life is. Can I really kick this bad habit of mine? I will do all it takes to stop complaining about everything in life. Wish me luck in doing it. :)
Many things in life happen for a reason. We have to go through to learn from it. Many say that life is a big university. I totally agree because no matter at what age or at which point of our lives we are in, we are learning and changing from time to time till the day we die. There is no such thing as a person will never change as people change every second to adapt to the changes around. If a person doesn't change at all, then this person may become obsolete like fashion and technology. No change means no improvement, so do change for the better and not the worst.

Do destiny and fate play a part in life?

2009-05-08T15:26:00.002+08:00

Are fate and destiny the same thing? I went to check on the net for its meaning. It is actually quite similar. Some people said that we are in control of our lives, but others said that destiny or fate controls our lives. How true are these sayings? I am not sure. However, I do believe that certain things in life can be controlled, and the rest are uncontrollable. Can we really control to change the things in our lives? Are things in our lifetimes fixed? There is a Chinese saying which said: Our deaths are fixed before the day we are even born. Is this really true? I am not sure as well. I do believe in one thing that is the people we meet in our lives are kind of destined. Take an issue for example to see whether life is destined. My sister has very good poly results, and she applied for NUS, NTU and SMU. Of these 3 universities, she preferred going to NUS if she was given the course of her choice. She had chosen business for all three universities. NUS gave her computer engineering, NTU gave her psychology and SMU gave her business. She tried appealing for the business courses in NUS and NTU. But both universities rejected her. In the end, she accepted SMU's offer. So is this destined? To me, it is kind of destined and it seems like things that are destined can't be changed. I read a book by Dr Brian Weiss, a psychiatrist who accidentally knew where souls go after they have died, and souls do reincarnate. In his books that I had read, certain things in life are destined and this is especially true for soul mates. But even if our lives are destined, there are roads for us to choose from. So this means that throughout our lifetimes we can make certain choices in life and each choices made will bring us to a different path. If we feel that we had made a mistake in our choice, we could correct it by taking a spilt road out of the main road to another main road. I think our lives are about choices we make, and destiny do somewhat play a role in our lives.

What a fast and easy shopping for dad's birthday gift

2009-05-08T12:31:00.002+08:00

Was suppose to go down town to check out what to buy for my dad's birthday which is coming soon. However, my sis's laziness has cause us to just shop around Toa Payoh Central. In the end, we bought a set of hand rests which will help my dad to rest his wrist when he is using the computer keyboard and mouse. Actually, I thought of going to down to have a walk, and to relax at a coffee house later in the day. But my sis has kind of ruin it as we had bought the gift so there is no use going down to town. Seems like these few weeks I will be trapped at my grandma's house, my house or in Toa Payoh Central. Haiz....I hope that the companies that I sent my resume to will call me soon for an interview because I think I will be bored to death soon. I think only through going to work, I can get out of the houses, Toa Payoh Central and hopefully Singapore to get a break from everything here. I am not saying Singapore is not a good country, but having spend 26 years of my life here feels like I am a frog in the well, not aware of what is really going around the world. Even though I do read the newspapers, I don't think it really help because the news doesn't really show us the different cultures of the world.

Another day

2009-05-07T08:46:00.002+08:00

Wondering when will the economy will really recover. I have send out numerous resumes and none have got back to me. Where did it when wrong? Is it my resume or cover letter is the root of the problem? The only ones who are interested in roping me in at the moment are the insurance companies. Why hasn't any companies that I sent my resume to call to ask for an interview? Am I not good for them or is the economy still so bad that they are reconsidering hiring of people? Haiz.....I guess no one could really answer my questions, but to ask me look at a brighter side and take this time to rest since I had just finish my exams just two weeks ago.

For the past few days, what I have done were playing games, blogging, going on facebook, reading storybooks, watching dvds, surfing the net and slacking at home. Boring, right? I guess many of you who read this will find that I am a rather boring girl who stays at home most of the time. As you can see, my life is not that colorful but rather dull. The reason that I am not going out so often is because I want to lower my spending power. My only concern now is to find a suitable job to stop my dad from nagging at me. My dad's actions and words are clear that he wants me to get a job soon even though he told me to take my time. Haiz....how long will I take to be hired? Will I get a job that I like with reasonable remunerations? I really don't know the answers to that. I guess only fate knows the answers to my questions.

After a game of badminton

2009-05-05T13:04:00.002+08:00

Early this morning I had a game of badminton with my sister. The game was fun at first, but there was a group of people who came too early. They booked the court from 10am, but they came so early at 8am plus. This group of guys are very inconsiderate because they should have wait for their turn at some other place instead they waited near the court. Our personal belongings were place at a bench near the court that we were playing. The guys were so inconsiderate, and sat at the bench. Our belongings are there, how can they sit there! That is very rude and impolite. Can't they just move to other places?! Irritating bunch of people. I don't want to talk about those guys anymore to spoil my mood.
Temperature checks are now everywhere. Even when my sister and I went to Safra to play badminton this morning, we had to register and had our temperatures checked. I think in another few weeks time every place we go in Singapore we will have to register and check temperature.

Slacking at home

2009-05-04T13:14:00.004+08:00

As usual, I am currently slacking at home while trying to find a job of suitability. With this hot weather, staying at home seems impossible because it is really humid and hot. No use switching on the fan because it doesn't really help. I think I will go library to enjoy the air-conditional and look for books to read to get my brain working. I am afraid that slacking too long at home and not using any brain would cause a mental slow down.
Talking about going to the library, the H1N1 virus has made many public places start taking down contacts of people when they enter the building. Why did I say this? Because the library is doing it. Every person who enters the library has to have their NRIC or library card scanned or else you will be denied of entering the premise. So those who are planning to go to the public library, remember to bring along your library card or personal identification card. I heard that even the HDB is doing this as well. Haiz....this H1N1 virus has caused many inconveniences and scare to many people around the world.
Can you imagine 80% of the news reported these days are about H1N1 virus? I know that it is a serious matter, but too many reports on it have become 'news unworthy.' This scare has also cause many people to eat less pork. Even though the news have clarified that H1N1 virus will not be transmitted through eating pork, people are still afraid of eating it which has caused the sales of pork to drop. With the bad economic crisis, people have been eating less outside. Now with this new virus going around the world, I guess even lesser people will be eating out and I am not sure how the hawkers, restaurants and cafes are going to survive this.
Singapore has yet to have any cases of it (I hope that we will not have any cases at all), but the government is taking very precautionary measures to deal with this recent virus because of the SARS virus that we had encountered years ago. The SARS virus that hit here has caused a number of death cases in Singapore, and put many people in quarantine. I understand why Singapore is reacting in this way, but at times I find that it is a little overdone.

Boring

2009-05-02T21:35:00.002+08:00

It has been a week plus since exam have ended. I am looking for a job, and have sent out numerous resumes. But none of them have get back to me nor have they ask me to go for interviews. Haiz....many say it is a good time to take a break from this transition. I do agree, but I don't want to depend on my parents for too long because it is embarrassing to be living off my parents. So I hope that the job of suitability will come to me soon. I hope to get a job that I would like soon, and will allow me the chance to travel overseas to visit the different countries on this Earth. I hope to absorb and learn about the different countries' cultures which will enrich my life in many ways. I believe that through travelling, I will understand the culture of the country better. I hope that when the day I leave this world, I will have visited every single country. I know this will cost a lot, but I hope to immerse myself in the different cultures, understand how people live and to taste different countries cuisines.

About the post that I wrote previously, please do not worry. It was just an emotion surge. After that, I am once again back to my old self. I am still enjoying the single life that I have now. Other than my family to worry about, I am practically as free as a bird without having to face relationship problems. No matter it is single or attached, there are the pros and cons. So do cherish the life of being either single or attached because what is present now will not be the same in the future. Furthermore, once time has past, it can never turn back. Those who are attach, do cherish the relationship you have with your partner. If both of you do quarrel, fight or have disagreements, take it as a way to understand your partner better. For those who are single like me, take this opportunity to spend more time with your family and grandparents. This can help to improve the relationship with them and to know them better. So some who are attached don't need to be envious about people who are single because some who are single are envious those who are attached. For me, I am not envious about people who are attached because I am trying to live my life to the fullest, and enjoying every minute of my single status by spending time with my grandma, family and friends. :-)

mood swing

2009-04-18T21:45:00.000+08:00

Was it the coffee or was I having a mood swing? All of a sudden,I wish that I have a boyfriend. The loneiness just came upon me which make me feel that having someone to care for me and shower me with love will be great. I have not been dating for a long time and that right guy has not come by. Or has he came but I miss it? I know that being in a relationship has its pro and cons. Sometimes being single for so long makes me feel whether will I be single forever? I don't know what lies ahead of me, but I am hoping for the best in eveything. Will the right person ever come by? This is still a big mystery to me.

Last semester and back into reality world

2009-04-10T17:58:00.002+08:00

Yesterday was the last day of school. Next week onwards will be study week, and the week after will be examinations. After the exams, I will be 'officially' called a graduate. Time flies really fast. At the twinkle of an eye, three years of school life is gone. These three years in SIM I will be taking away with me the knowledge, friendships, laughter and memories. It has been a wonderful three years for me because I am able to enjoy school life again after 21 months of working life. It is also the most cherished one because I have learned to appreciate this life only when I started working. I know that I will never return to such life again as I will be thrown out into the world of reality soon. This time it will be a lifetime in the reality world till I retire. How I wish that time would just stop here..........
Back to reality. With such a bad economy, I am not sure how long will I take to find a job. However, I hope that I will find a job that I love, and will allow me to travel overseas as well.

I want to wish all my classmates all the best for the future, and hope that all of you will find the job that you love soon. Lastly to those classmates who read my blog, we must keep in touch with each other. If there is meet up, do call me along. :)

"Departure" - A japanese movie

2009-03-13T20:28:00.002+08:00

Haiz......it take me so long to update my blog. It seems like I am updating it only once in a blue moon. I do hope to update my blog more often, but I am quite busy recently due to my school work. Today was very scary for me because I had my impromptu speech. I did not practice at all like what Professor Armstrong had advice us to do. I was given the topic "film" and had to talk for a minute. I was nervous and scare that I had a lot of "hmm" which was bad. Later in the day, I went for a movie with Liyana, Pearlene and Priyanka. We went to watch a Japanese movie, Departure, which won the Academy Award for the Best International Foreign Film. The movie was awesome, but it did bring back many memories for many people who watched it as I heard quite a number of sobs near the end of the film. For me, the memory of how my (paternal)grandmother died. That day of her death, the announcement of her death and the cries from my dad, mum, uncles, aunties & cousins came flooding back to me. It has been 15 years, but the sight, sound and feeling is still so vivid to me like it was yesterday. Her death left such an impression on me because she was murdered by a ruthless man who tried to rob her for easy money. My grandmother did not gave in to the robber so she was killed in the process. This was one of the feeling that I had while watching the film, the other aspect that I had was it really change my view of an undertaker. I really respected them and have a very different view of it after watching it. This is a very good film which I will recommend you to watch.

Where is the end?!!!

2009-02-19T19:04:00.002+08:00

Have you ever feel that there are times when the problem doesn't goes away no matter how you try to solve it? I have this experience especially with my dad. To solve this problem, I have to literally give in because I didn't want to start a quarrel. I know that my parents love me, but I feel that my dad, especially is treating me like a small girl even though I'm turning 26 this year. I know that parents are protective of their children, but I feel that at times the protectiveness can be suffocating. I know that my dad has become better when compared to the past. However, I still feel like a bird in a cage. I feel that my dad has not fully trusted me in certain ways because he still treats me like a small kid at times. Haiz......sometimes I feel that my parents don't understand me in certain ways. It would be difficult at times to make them understand certain things because they just cannot seems to see our viewpoint. I had tried many times to make them see things from my viewpoint, especially my dad, but it always end up in a quarrel which I'm sick of. Sometimes I wonder when would they see things in our viewpoint? Will things improve to where I wanted it to be when I turned 30?

This is also the reason why I don't want to get a boyfriend. If I have boyfriend/husband like my dad who is over-protective, I think I will choose to stay single forever.

Dont know why?

2009-02-17T18:03:00.002+08:00

It has been long since I had last updated my blog. I am writing today because I felt very down all of a sudden. I was feeling normal this morning and afternoon. I didn't know what had happen to me, but when I board the bus after class to go home I felt very sad and depressed all of a sudden. My mood really went down to the lowest. I have not felt so down in my life before, and didn't know how or where did this feeling come from. Could it be that I am too nervous and worried about my speech which I will be giving tomorrow or is it because I have not been exercising to increase the happy hormones? I just can't put a finger where the problem is. I wanted to feel better so I treated myself to a brownie hoping that it could uplift my mood. After eating it, my mood was not uplifted at all. So I decided to blog hoping that by getting things off my chest would help. I am feeling a little better now, but that sadness is still there.

How do I get rid of it? What is happening to me? Why am I feeling this way? Where is the root of the problem so that I can get overcome it? I really don't understand why I am feeling this way. Who can give me an answer?

back from my holidays

2008-12-19T12:01:00.002+08:00

I'm back from my USA trip. The trip was fun, relaxing and scenic which I had enjoyed throughout. However, the part where I had to sleep on the plane was terrible as my neck was killing me each time when I woke up. This trip really opened my eyes to America and their culture over there. The weather is cool over there and I really enjoy the cold weather even though it could be freezing at times. Liyana, Pearlene and myself bought many things, but I think the winner would be Pearlene as she bought the most,lol. We ate fast food almost everyday, and their fast foods were delicious with huge potion size. The first night when I reached U.S, I had jetlagged as I woke up at 12am and could not sleep till 3 am. The second night was similar to my first night which was terrible for me as I felt very tired the next day. We saw the neon lights in Las Vegas and every hotel has a different theme to it which we fun really cool and nice. We saw the daybreak at Grand Canyon which was magnificant as the colors of the Canyon changes with the rising sun. However, we were out of luck as it was too cloudy to see the sun rise. We had fun in Disneyland, California Land and Universal Studio as we took the rides. The most daring among the three of us would be Peralene because she took almost all the rides in these theme parks. All fun have to come to an end as we need to head home after the end of 10days in U.S. Now, I still kind of jetlagging as I'm feeling sleepy even though I slept at 9plus pm last night and woke up 7plus am this morning. I think I need a few days more to get use to Singapore timing.

Exams are finally over

2008-12-02T18:34:00.002+08:00

Ya! Exams are over and in 5 days time I will be flying to US for my holiday. Really can't wait to go. I have yet to pack my things, but will be doing tonight. Even though I'm excited about the holiday, I'm also afraid that the weather in US will drop to very low as I'm afraid of cold. I guess if it drops till very low, I will be wearing a few layers of clothes. So excited, but how am I going to do during the 17hours flight because the movies that will be showing on board do not appeal to me. It will be a very long flight, and I hope that I will be able to sleep on the plane because the last time I went to Japan, I could not fall asleep even though I was very tired. Hopefully this time I will be able to sleep 10 hours on the plane. :-)

Now I need to pack my stuff and decide what to bring over there. I'm also praying that when we go over, the temperature will not drop till very low. Hopefully, it will maintain at 8-10 Degree Celsius.

@ Delifrance

2008-11-29T15:40:00.000+08:00

Guess where I am right now.I'm now in Toa Payoh Delifrance studying because I find studying at home very distracting.I'm using my Omnia to blog right this moment.
It has been weeks since I last blog, and I know that I should be concentrating on studying for exam instead of blogging. However,this feeling of blogging just came upon me and now I am satisfying this so called 'urge.'
Just to update those reading my blog on the past few days of my life. I have been reading the textbooks for the past one week for the upcoming exams,attended a friend's wedding at Swissôtel on Thursday and went to make the final payment for the trip to US with Liyana and Pearlene. As you can all see my life is rather dull. By the way,yesterday we went to get locks that are suitable for the US Custom checking. This is because I heard from my air stewardess friend that US Custom may open luggaues to do physical checks,to do so they will break the lock if they dont have the master key to your luggaues lock. Because of this we went to purchase locks which only the TSA has the master key to the locks.If you want to know more, you can check the google on the Internet for it. Anyway,I'm really excited about the trip and was hoping that the exams have ended right this moment. Really can't wait to go. After my exams,I will start my packing and will be counting down the days to my depature date. Yahoo,US here I come. I believe this would be a good break for me after this tedious and stressful semester before continuing my last semester on January.

Thats all for now as I need to get back to my books.Haiz....this is so sian.Can't wait for it to be over soon. I must get A for both exams. I can do it. :-)

7th Nov

2008-11-07T15:30:00.005+08:00

2 more weeks to classes end and a month to exam. Really can't wait for it to end because I'm so looking forward to the trip to U.S. I think among Pearlene, Liyana and me, Liyana is the one most looking forward because she has started packing her winter wear and some clothes. That's really fast. I hoping the U.S dollar will fall when the time comes for us to buy the dollars and when we reach there. So excited about the trip. :-D
But back to reality for the moment. There are still 2 more assignments to go for COM 443 and my spring semester timetable is out. This time they have given as the list of lecturers who will teaching the different classes. When I saw the COM 326's lecturers, my instinct tells me to choose Bob's class. I don't dare to risk my last semester at UB/SIM so I will be choosing Bob's class for COM 326. I will be re-taking MGG150 as I did badly previously. This time the lecturer for this course is no longer Bob Foo. I'm hoping that under this new lecturer I will have a better grade for MGG 150.

I must preserve as the end of the semester is coming. Yeah!!!
BUT I NEED TO SAVE MORE MONEY :-( [If anyone is willing to donate to wei si's charity fund, I will glady accept and put to good use during my U.S trip
:-p]

The assignments are getting on my nerves

2008-10-28T08:26:00.003+08:00

I feel that I am going to hyperventilating because of the assignments, and they are really getting on my nerves. I have not been sleeping well the past few nights and was dreaming a lot on school stuff. But I could not remember what I had dreamt once I woke up. Feeling very sleepy right this moment because I have been sleeping late recently. This feeling is really bad and is driving me kind of crazy as my bad temper will surfaced easily when provoked. I hope I will not explode like a volcano that has been extinct for a long time because I think that would be terrible and many people would be "burned." I think I need a way to bring that bad energy out of me through good way. AHHHHHH!!!!!! I WANT ALL THIS ASSIGNMENTS TO END NOW! All these assignments made me have no life and have no time to study! END THE SEMESTER NOW!!!!!!! IT IS DRIVING ME CRAZY!

some phrases

2008-10-18T00:26:00.002+08:00

the calmness before the storm
the peacefulness before the chaos
the rest before the battle starts

Can't imagine how will I live through next week?
Endless work coming up.....

Photo shooting today

2008-10-10T22:37:00.006+08:00

Today, I went to my cousin's house to 'borrow' his daughter to be my model. Luckily, I asked my uncle, who is a freelance photographer, to help to take the pictures because children at age 2 have short attention span and does not have that much of a patience. The photo shoot takes only 10-15 minutes, and its done. I was kind of shock because that is really fast! If not for my uncle, I don't think it will end that fast plus the coaxing from my cousin-in-law has helped a lot. My niece has corporates well during the photo shoot, but needed some coaxing at times. This photo shoot is an experience for me, and it is not easy to take photos of kids that young of age. But she is so adorable......

Here are two beautiful pics of her:

Improvement needed

2008-10-08T18:55:00.002+08:00

I know that I should be studying for my COM441 mid-term but I feel that I have to get things off my chest. My COM 443 results are not up to my expectations. I do not mean my project group work, but my personal work which is the test and my reflection papers results to this date. My test result has not turned out well because it is my fault for studying it at the last minute. I know I shouldn't have study at the last minute and should have better plan my time. I got back my second reflection paper today. Both the first and second reflection papers had not turned out well. I had followed Bob's guidelines, but it seems like both reflection papers had not met his expectations. I don't know what really went wrong, but my guessing is either I had misinterpret his questions or my writings are bad. I have yet investigate, but will do it after my COM 441 mid-term. I have input my thoughts, but were the thoughts not provoking enough to show that I am reflecting. I wonder what he really wants. This is really frustrating for me because here I am trying to do my very best for the assignments that he gives, and there he is unsatisfied with my works. Haiz....I can't afford to get any Bs for this semesters; furthermore, I'm only doing 2 modules so I should do even better. I need to get As for these 2 modules in order to pull up my GPA. I want to achieve an honor degree, at least a 3rd degree honor because now my current GPA is nowhere near there. My aim is a 2nd honor degree so I must strive even harder to get it. I must work 4-5 times as hard to reach my goal.

Wei Si, you can achieve it! Don't give up! You can achieve As for these two modules so don't worry. Just work even harder and you will get it. A is within your reach for these two modules. Revise your plans and improve yourself so that you can get better grades. You will achieve the results you want and get a second degree honor by the time you graduate. YOU CAN DO IT! BELIEVE IN YOURSELF AND KEEP IMPROVING & IMPROVISING!

counting down to 1230am

2008-10-04T00:18:00.003+08:00

Wondering why I am still up so late even though I'm sick? Haiz....no choice because there is COM443 project meeting online at 1230am later. Hopefully we would end fast with all of us having consenses to things. I want to recover soon too, but the cough won't burge which is frustrating. I have finish my cough mixture already so hopefully by tomorrow I will get better. Worst part now is the effect of the medicine has started to kick in, and it is making me drowsy. Hope that I will be alert, and know what is going on.

Pictures during Lego 'treasure hunt'

2008-10-02T23:27:00.003+08:00

Here are photos during the search for Lego, but this is in PS Mac:

Project discussion going on

Still dicussing

Having some fun with the camera, but Priscilla seems tired

Priscilla starts her drawing......

went for a hair cut

2008-10-02T16:12:00.004+08:00

A day after the public holiday........
I am still sick, and did not sleep well last night because the itchiness at the throat kept me awake. This is kind of bad as I did not get my well-deserved rest. When I was in my COM441 class this morning, I thought that I will faint while typing the notes that Bob gave. I told myself that I cannot fall so somehow my will-power kept me going on. Bob went through the slides like a bullet train which made many of us unable to the entire slides. This is kind of frustrating for me because I am a slow typer. I was suppose to go home early to rest so that I can recover faster, but I end up going to the hair salon to get my hair cut. Now, I had just finished my bath after the hair cut, and wondering I should get a nap as I am still tired. I also feel drained because my body need to work twice as hard now to fight of the 'foreigners' in my body. I hope that it recovers quick enough so that I won't need to suffer longer in this state. I promise once I recover, I will exercise regularly to keep it healthy.Please recover soon........

Before haircut

After haircut

Sick

2008-09-29T18:01:00.002+08:00

Haiz....I have fallen sick. Now having sore throat and cough. I hate sore throat because it is painful and I have difficulty in swallowing whenever I drink or eat. I went to see the doctor after school and had taken the medicine. The effect of the medicine is still affecting me now because I'm still in a drowsy state. I had nap and the drowsiness has not wear off. This kind of feeling really is taking a toll on me because when I walk, I'm like floating in mid-air and it makes my body feels weak. I think the doctor has given me a strong medication that makes me go kind of 'high' now. Maybe this is how those drug addicts feel when they take drugs. I wonder why they like this kind of feeling when you are not able to gain control of yourself. This feels awful and I hate it. I want my healthy body back! My immune system, please fight and win this battle. After my recovery, I must have regular exercise to boost my immunity and make it stronger. I really hate falling sick because it feels sucks to be weak, and once I'm weak, somehow I would wish that there would be a special someone to care for me.

Updating about last weekend, I went to my secondary school friend's weeding on Saturday. Met up with some of my old classmates there. As usual, people start asking me whether am I attach, and I have gave the usual answer which is 'no.' There I found out that another two of my classmates are getting married soon. One will be in 27th Nov and the other is on the 28th Dec of this year. I can't imagine that I would be attending 5 weddings this year. That is a lot of money to be spent. The thing that I dislike the most would be whenever I tell my parents or grandma that I have to attend wedding dinners, they would say that I should find a boyfriend soon and get married. Haiz....whether I have boyfriend or not and whether I would get married, I leave that up to fate because I'm not that kind of girl who would take the initiative to do that.

Sick?!

2008-09-28T12:16:00.002+08:00

Sunday should be a relaxing day for me, but I have my COM443 test on tomorrow. The test covers chapter 1-9, and this is a disater for me because there is so many things to study. On top of that, I'm kind of sick. Having cough....what a weekend for me. I know that I should be studying, but I have this huge urge of writing how I feel now somewhere so I choose to blog. Sick at this point of time is no good. Argh.....I hate to be sick especiallywhen there are so many things going around. I hope that I will not screw up my test for tomorrow. I believe I will to very well and score high marks (a mental boost for me). I must do well because there I need to get A for my COM443. I want to pull up my GPA. I can do it, I must not fall at this point of time because I need more energy than ususal to move on.
I MUST GO BACK TO STUDY NOW! ARGH.....9 CHAPTERS in total. :-(

A month later....

2008-09-24T23:27:00.004+08:00

It has been nearly a month since school started but it felt like many months have past. Imagine this, I'm taking only two modules but it seems like I am taking 4-5 modules at the same time. The projects and assignments are never ending with test and mid-term coming up in a few weeks time. This kind of life is terrible because I am kind of hyperventilating at this point in time. Only into the 5/6 weeks of school and I felt like I had been in school for a long time. The thing that would give me a glimpse of hope and light is the trip in December where Pearlene, Liyana and me would be going to the U.S for holiday. YEAH! I'm so looking forward to it, but also worry about money factor. Hope that I will be able to save enough for my spending there. I guess I would be carrying lots of things back because some of my friends who know that I'm going want me to help them buy stuff. So I guess my luggage would be packed with people's things and not mine. Maybe I should charge for the transportation fee.Hahaha.....
Back to reality, Bob's class may be fun at times but the assignments that he gives are kind of killing us. He had no specifications of what he wants and this made many of us guessing/misinterpret the assignments. It may be good that he did not set the boundaries but at least, tell us the standard of each assignment that you expecting. My COM443 group is ok at the moment and we are working well together. I hope that we will continue to work well together and do even better for each assignment which will let Bob's eyes fall off because he is so impressed with us.Hahaha......

started school

2008-08-27T18:20:00.002+08:00

Today is the third day of school reopening. This first week seems relax, but this calmness is a sign of a storm that is coming. This would be a very big storm where numerous projects will be thrown at us. Even though I'm taking 2 modules, there are 6-7 project works and 3-4 reflection papers for each modules. I nearly fainted upon seeing this. :-X The first assignment that I received today is COM 443 reflection paper which will be due on the coming Wednesday. COM 443 project group mates have been revealed this morning. Professor Armstrong ask us to draw lots to see which group we will be in. My group mates consist of 2 juniors, and 2 of my classmates who I have not worked with at all. So I am kind of worry of what the outcome will be. I hope that everything will turn out well, and the work we churn out would be good and of high quality. I believe that this COM 443 group that I'm in, have the best people and we will work well together to produce top quality work. I believe that all of us in this group are the best. For the time being, Jie Lin and I would need to depend on each other to bring the work quality to the best.

15 Aug 2008

2008-08-15T11:03:00.002+08:00

Olympics has started, having holiday now and slacking at home all day........
Holiday had just started last Thursday, and I still have another week to go before school reopens. These few weeks have been going out a lot because some of the UB classmates were going to the US. But as I am writing now, they have already gone to the US. Some may have reached there. I do somewhat envy them because I feel that this is a once in a life time experience. Even though I can't go over, I still wish them the best in their studies.

During these few days, I had went to the airport to send some friends off to the US. Met up with my polytechnic friends. And the thing I did most was sit at home to watch the Olympics games. Thinking about how time flies, I will be graduating next year end April and will be embarking on a tour to US this coming December. I will be going with 3 of my UB classmates, but one of them have not confirm yet. This will be something to look forward to by the end of the year. In additional, this is the first time that I will be travelling overseas with friends.

Next semester, I have 2 modules and will be in school for only 4 days.......but my Fridays will be off :-)

The summer....

2008-07-03T23:08:00.003+08:00

I have finished my first half of my summer courses. Now, I'm having the next half. These six weeks courses have been quite hectic and was almost suffocated. I have checked my results for the two courses that I had in the first half and found that I have scored A- and B-. I still need to buck up to pull my overall GPA to at least 3.2. Currently, my GPA is 3.008 so I really need As to pull it up. My goal GPA is 3.5 because I want to get at least a second degree honors. As seen here, the gap between my current and goal GPA is big; therefore, I need to work extremely hard to close this gap. Hopefully, I do not need to re-take those courses which I had done badly to close this gap. I believe that I can do it. I cannot fall below a B grade now. I must keep my grade range from A to B, and not anything below that. I believe that I can achieve it. Yes, I can!

Update a little of my life.....
Last weekend, met up with my secondary school friends, and found that they have changed a lot. Among the five of us, two are mothers and three of us, which include me, are still unmarried. This shows how time has fly. During the meet up, like other meet-ups with friends that have not seen for a very long time, they would ask me whether I have a boyfriend. This question has not been asked by my friends only, but also my relatives, grandma and parents. My dad, especially, seems to hope that I can get married off fast. Haiz....I know that I turning 25 this year and have yet to have a boyfriend. I won't be looking for it because I am passive towards it, and I know that it is a new era now. But I don't have the guts to make the first move so I have leave it to fate to decide. My answer to those who asked me have been: "I leave it to fate. If the right one comes along, I will get married. But if there isn't, it is fine with me as I like single life as well." This answer has not been able to satisfy many because they will continue with: "Is your standards too high?", "Go find", etc. I can see that the older one is, the more people are concern with when you will settle down and start a family.....
My answer to all: If I have a boyfriend, I will bring him to show you. So for the time being, please let me off.....

I'm Back!

2008-06-06T15:57:00.004+08:00

It has been a long time since I have wrote in this blog. My semester has started, and I'm in the third week of this six weeks course. It is quite hectic, but I'm still coping well with it. During my break, I went to Japan with my family. It was a rejuvenating and refreshing break as I was away from the familiar surroundings. This trip has enriched me in many ways, for example having a better understanding of their culture, seeing things that can't be seen in Singapore. In my point of view, Japan is a fascinating place as there have splendid scenic views and the people are very different in term of fashion, etc. I would definitely want to go back to Japan again because I find that they have a very rich culture and the modern Japan is very unique. My dream is to be able to travel all over the world to experience each unique culture......

Just now, I watched a very interesting interview with a Rinpoche (recarination of a Tibetan monk). It helps me to better understand certain things in life. There is a phrase which I find it very true. It goes like this:"The so-called grief and suffering in this world comes from the happiness that we hope to achieve. The so-called joy and happiness in this world comes from the happiness that we hope others can get." (the original phrase was in chinese, so I translated it)

Its holidays!

2008-04-29T09:26:00.002+08:00

Today, I'm entering into my 5th day of my holiday. My holiday started on last Friday after my last paper which is on Thursday. At last getting some rest and a break from school work. Last Friday was Anita's birthday so we went for a celebration of her birthday at Seoul Garden. We were also celebrating the end of our exams and beginning of our holidays. After lunch on Friday, we went around to have some funny photo shoots. Later in the evening, we went drinking at Clark Quay area. It was fun, but I'm looking forward to go abroad for holiday to really relax myself, and recompose myself for the coming Summer semester which would be a fast and challenging one. This semester holiday will only last for three weeks so I must treasure it. For the past few days I have been doing some leisure reading to kill time. I want to spend these holidays more fruitful, meaningful and exciting. Hopefully, I can do it. I need to re-organise my thoughts and find answers to some questions.....

The feeling is back again

2008-04-04T18:51:00.003+08:00

That feeling is coming back to me again. The feeling of leaving this country and people I know. I really need a break for a few weeks to go to a place where no one knows me. I need to get myself back together. I need peace and quiet for just a few weeks to re-compose myself. I want to get out of Singapore for a few weeks alone to do some deep thinking. I REALLY NEED THIS! But I am not sure how I'm going to do that because my parents still control me even though I'm turning 25 this year. Those who are reading may be laughing at me. A 25 year old female who still needs to inform where she is going, who she is out with, what time will be back,etc to her parents. Maybe some who are reading may think that I'm fortunate that my parents care a lot about me. I know I'm fortunate, but I need more breathing space. I need to find the real me because I am somewhat lost on the road that I'm now walking upon. So I really need to get away from Singapore and people who I know.

Singapore flyer

2008-03-23T16:50:00.003+08:00

On board Singapore Flyer on 21/3/08..........

sudden emotion surge

2008-03-18T21:30:00.004+08:00

I don't know what has gotten into me today. Maybe it is the work of caffeine and the stress. I got an emotion surge all of a sudden. This sudden surge of emotion made me think that it would be great if I had a boyfriend. I have enjoyed my single life for the past four years plus. I like single hood because I am not restricted. I enjoy the freedom that I have, and I do not need to answer to anyone except my parents and myself for the things that I have done. But at times, I do hope to have a partner by my side who I can depend on plus who will be able to comfort me. I know that friends could do the same thing as well. Seldom do I go to friends when I am feeling down because I don't want to trouble them. I know that my friends have their own life especially my best friend who has her own family now. Friends come to me often with their problems which I don't mind because I hope that I will be able to help them solve it. I hope that the guy who I will spend the rest of my life with would be would be my best friend as well. Haiz....would there be such a guy?
Talking about relationship, i had 2 during my secondary school days and 1 four years ago. All these 3 relationship did not last long, none lasted more than a year. The shortest I had was around a month and longest about half a year. There are 2 guys who changed me a lot. One was in secondary school which I had hurt the guy very badly and the other guy is a very very good friend of mine who I had not started a relationship with him. The guy who I hurt deeply changed a lot because of me, and this taught me a lesson that I must think through before accepting a relationship. My best guy friend who I fell for taught me a lesson that I should not have spoiled the friendship between the both of us. The most regretful thing I had done was to confess to my best guy friend that I liked him and I did certain things that kind of hurt him. This ended the friendship between me and him. Furthermore, it had made me become very passive when it comes to love plus I did not dare to accept good male friends who I know as a boyfriend because I don't want to ruin the friendship that had been built. It made me realise that friendship is more important than BGR, andthat is the reason I have not enter into a relationship. The other reason I have not enter into a relationship is because there isn't anyone at the moment. Many has asked when would I find one. My answer to you is "I have leave it to fate."

Watched Leap Years

2008-03-10T20:27:00.003+08:00

"Its better to have love and lost than never to have loved before." Those who have watched the movie Leap Years would be familiar with this phrase. This movie did not touched me like it have for many others. However, I find myself somewhat similiar in the character Li-Ann before she met Jeremy. The part where her mother said that she was already 24 and have not has a boyfriend. I am somewhat in that stage where my parents and grandma have asked me when I'm going to find a boyfriend. Furthermore, I'm turning 25 this year. This movie made me reflect on certain things in life. Choosing between the guy that you really love and the guy who loves you more than you love him. This is a tough choice for everyone. For me, this movie is somewhat another fairy tale story. This movie is telling people to go after the love of your life so that you would not live in regret. But in reality, how many can be like the main characters in many of the love movies? I do not have the answer to the question. I still would ask at times, will the right man really appear? Till today, it is still a big question mark for me........

busy.....

2008-03-06T21:37:00.004+08:00

I am feeling the stress falling upon me. There are so many projects and assignments to complete. The moment I see those deadlines, it immediately gave me the feeling that in the whole of March I do not have the time to breathe. This is how bad the stress is falling upon me for this month. After this month is over, the exams will be on its way. Now, it is only the beginning of March,and I have feeling extremely tried. How I wish that I can have a break. But I can't because I am holding heavy responsibility for the projects that I am handling. AHHHH........
Human relations is one big thing which must be tackle in a very tactful way. I am still learning it to this point because to handle people one has to be sensitive to the surroundings and be quick in thinking & action. I think the way I handle people can be improved much more in every aspect. To master human relation, it is a life long learning process......

I am looking forward to the school holiday and need to get out of this country & people I know badly (if i am able to). I need real peace and quite plus time for myself.........

Chang Family video

2008-02-24T10:28:00.004+08:00

This video was my COM125 homework assignment. A simple video, hope that you will enjoy........

Chinese New Year

2008-02-10T09:19:00.001+08:00

My family

My sister and I

Janielle (Niece)

Emma(Niece)

Benjamin(Nephew) and my Mum

A group of 80s babies

This CNY has been busy visiting my relatives and collecting ang pows. :-) In these 4 days of CNY, we have broken the record of visiting because we have finished visiting all the relatives. Yeah!!!!! But I still wish to have another day of rest........

I have completed parts of my homework. There is one more homework left to do, and I have not study for my test & midterm. They are on wedesday and thursday respectively. Haiz.....must buck up to complete my school work, and study everything by Tuesday. Jia you, Wei Si! I can do it, yes!

2 Days to CNY

2008-02-04T10:50:00.000+08:00

CNY is here in 2 days time, but I have many school work to complete. After CNY, I have 2 tests and 1 assignment due. I guess this CNY wouldn't be that fun for me after all. Haiz.....deadlines after deadlines, and human problems to deal with. Sometimes I just wonder why human need to be so rigid? Where has the flexibility gone to? Is making changes so difficult that everything need to be done through rules? Just make some changes to it, that would be fine. Why do humans need to be so particular about things? Just give in and take, that would be fine. I just can't understand sometimes.
Haiz....human are very complex animal..........

Second week of school

2008-01-23T18:49:00.000+08:00

I am still in the "get to use" mode for this week. There are so many projects to do, and there is one particular project that is rushing because would need to get the survey done before the CNY. It is not easy to become the coordinator of a group especially there are eleven groupmates to deal with. I had no choice, but to have some key people so that I can control the group better. I think without a system being implemented, the group would be lost with no proper direction and goal. This is a challenge for me, and I hope that I can be a good coordinator to run the whole project smoothly. Hopefully, under my 'leadership,' everyone would work well and cooperate. I believe that I can do well,and is up for this challenge. Wei Si, Jia you! :-)

Shopping for CNY

2008-01-20T15:25:00.000+08:00

The past 3-4 Sundays have been spent on shopping for new clothes and a pair of shoes for the coming Chinese New Year. Luckily, today I have finished buying the clothes and shoes that I wanted. So next Sunday I would not need to spend the time on shopping again. Even though I am a female, I do not like shopping that much. Those Sundays have been tiring for me because my legs aches a lot from the continuous walking which last for around 2-3hours for each shopping session. Most females shop and buy what they want throughout the year. However, I'm quite different because I only do shopping once a year. That is for the Chinese New Year. I will tend to buy a supply of clothes that I need for that year. The supply is not much, just a few new stuffs that's all as I still have clothes in my wardrobe. This year I bought a pair of pants, a pair of jeans, 5 t-shirts, a pair of shorts, a long sleeve polo-tee, a G2000 blue causal top, a long sleeve shirt and a pair of high heels. These will be my one year supply of clothes for the whole year. Actually I wanted to buy a bag, and a slipper, but because I had spent so much so I forgo the idea of getting it. Hmm.....maybe I do need a rich guy.......haha.... If I am able to find one, I would not mind. Hahaha........... :-)

First week of school

2008-01-18T10:21:00.000+08:00

The first week of school is kind of a "getting to use" week after the one month of holiday. The lecturers have gave an idea of what the whole semester will be like, and the work loads. Test and the first assignment are due soon. The rushing of work is also starting with worries of whether will we be able to meet the date line, and produce quality work. I am still in a blur state trying to cope with the much expectations from these courses. Therefore,I still need time to get use to the "working mode, studying mode and rushing mode."

New year and School reopening soon

2008-01-08T10:32:00.000+08:00

Time flies really fast. Today is already 8th January 2008. This week is my last week of school holiday, and school is starting on Monday. These five weeks of holidays I have been going out with my friends and rotting at home. I wanted to go overseas, but unable to go because my parents won't allow me to go travelling alone. I still need a break overseas because there are still things that I have yet to sort out. I really need much alone time to think through certain things, and where I want to go or do next. But I have not done so; moreover, I have brought problems from 2007 to 2008. I don't know when I am going to think it through and sort the things out. Hopefully soon.......
In life, I feel that I have to put up with different faces when I am with different group of people. Sometimes I am been confused by which is the real me. Even with people that I am closest to I need to put up a face because I do not want them to be worry about me. I really do need a break from this familiar place and the people I know. I need to go to a place which is quiet and re-compose myself. Someone who is so kind please fulfill this need of mine.......

Feeling troubled again

2007-11-21T23:14:00.000+08:00

Exams is coming. I am feeling troubled again. I really need a holiday badly to renew, refresh and rearrange my thoughts. There is too many things going on and the pressure is piling on me. I really need a breather. I want to go somewhere alone without my family and friends as I really need sometime alone. I really need the space to rearrange myself mentally and physically. This kind of feeling has increased its 'appearance' within me. I think I am hitting the limit of what I can take. Now, I envy people who are able to go overseas for holiday. I think I have been supressing my feeling too much, and bottle many things in me. I'm feeling very tired now, and really need a rest. Life is very tired for me currently. I want to go on holiday alone. I really need one.

Can't wait for next tuesday to end

2007-11-13T18:24:00.000+08:00

There is so many project deadlines and presentations this week and next week. I can't wait for it to end next Tuesday! After next Tuesday, I would be free of projects and presentations. :-) Yeah!!!! What is left would be the preparation of examination and then holidays will be here. Yes!!!! I really can't wait for the holidays to start so I can take a breather. These few months especially the end of the few weeks in this semester, I can feel the pressure pressing on me till I can feel that I can't breathe. When the holidays come, must take a week of really really good rest.
I know in life, I can't get everything I want or want everything to go my way. But still, I am really envy of those people who can get what they want and have things going the way they had expected. I want to be like those people one day because I believe that whatever difficulties, problems and hardships we go through it will eventually lead us to the goals that we have set for ourselves. Knowing that life isn't a bed of rose, more hardwork and determination are needed to achieve what we want in life. I believe that if we belive that we are able to do it, we can achieve it. Life has ups and downs; therefore, we need to learn how to turn the downs into motivation.

count down for final exam

2007-11-09T23:31:00.000+08:00

Final exam is around a month away. I have not started studying for the exam yet. :-( SOC101 and MGM409 are very heavy because one has 22 chapters and the other has 17 chapters. I hope I can start my revision early so that I will not have to do last minute cramping. Hopefully I can start next weekend because the coming week would be a busy week. Projects deadlines are flooding in next week. Monday have 2 projects that are due and Wednesday there is one too. There is a presentation on Friday. The coming week is a very busy week. Don't know whether I will have time to take a breather. It seems like next week I'm becoming a superwoman. haha....trying to complete everything. Must remind myself to print out the report for COM231 for Monday. Good news for next week, I don't need to be in school for Tuesday and Thursday. Yeah. :-) But I think would be reports rushing week because need to complete COM 337 and COM317. :-(
CAN'T WAIT FOR THE HOLIDAY TO START, AND WISH THAT IT WILL NEVER HAVE TO END. ;->

work work and more work

2007-11-02T14:35:00.000+08:00

The projects are never ending and the deadlines are back-to-back. I am been drown by all this work load. So many things to do, study and worry about. Why are all these stuff never ending? Where is the bottom of all these things? My COM231 has not been doing very well because I flunk my mid-term examination. I believe that I am able to pull the grade up to a B-. I will work very hard for it. No matter how steep is this mountain, I can do it.
I am now looking forward to the 1 month holiday that is coming on the 7th December. But I don't think that I will be able to go overseas for holiday. :-( Thats very upsetting because I yearn to go somewhere to relax with breathe-taking scenery, and where no one knows me. :-) Then I can re-organize my thoughs and everything. How I wish............
Can someone who is rich enough to sponsor me? :-)

An overseas trip in need

2007-10-25T22:17:00.000+08:00

I really need a holiday badly and need to get out Singapore. I need to be away from here, and away from people I know. I need some cooling down and bring myself out of the picture to look at things from another perspective or angle. These past few years many hard work is put into many aspects of life. I am feeling tired day by day. I really really need a holiday badly to revitalize my soul. I am so tempted to disappear to somewhere where no one knows me or be able to contact me.
LIFE HAS SO MANY UPS AND DOWNS, A REST IS NEEDED TO TRAVEL A LONGER JOURNEY! I WANT TO GO OVERSEAS......

A way to let off steam

2007-10-25T21:32:00.000+08:00

It has been a long long long time since I have written something inside here. I have been busy with school work and others. Many things have happen in this past months. Stress is sinking because of the deadlines. Emotion is also building up because the past days something has happened.
I don't really show my emotions to my friends especially anger. To my family, I will keep my emotions to the minimal especially when I'm troubled about somethings. Working for a year plus did taught me many things especially about human relationship. My supervisor once told me "a person with high EQ is better than a person with high IQ but low EQ." I wonder his reason for saying this in the first place, but I finally understand his reason for saying this. A high EQ person is able to hide the emotions very well even when one is very angry. The ability to tolerate is high. I have been practicing to control my emotions and increase my tolerance level. However, I have not master it as I still show my emotions on my face. It has also taught me that one needs to communicate flexibly when meeting up with different people. There is a chinese proverbs that goes like this "when you see a ghost, speak ghost language and when you see a human, speak human language." This means that the tactics of communication differ with people one comes in contact to.

Another cousin going to overseas again

2007-09-04T15:24:00.001+08:00

My cousins from my mum's side are going/ either gone to overseas to stay for a few months. They went because of work or for studies. What is happening? Why are they so lucky? I can only envy them that they got a chance to go overseas, and to stay there for few months.

First,my cousin who is older than me by 2years is at Maccu and Hong Kong for missionary work. He is there for 2 years, and will be coming back to Singapore soon. My cousin who is younger than me by 4 years is in Taiwan as he is posted there by the army, and he will be there for a year. Then my cousin who is younger than me by 7 years is studying in US , and she will be there for around 6years. Followed by my cousin who is younger than me by a year is at Holland because he is an exchange student for NUS. He would be there for around 6months to a year. Lastly, my cousin younger than me by two years will be flying off to Croatia this week for internship for 2 months. The ones left, who may not have a chance to experience the life staying in other countries for few months, are my sister and me.

I'm not sure how my sister feels about this. As for me, I'm really envy them to be able to have this kind of experience that I dream of since I was in secondary school. I guess I would never have the chance of going overseas to study because firstly I don't have that kind of money. Secondly, my parents would allow especially my dad. My dad is very protective, even though I'm 24 this year. Haiz....sometimes I do think when will I will be able to break through to get the freedom that I always wanted. I can only say this, unless miracle happens then I will be able to go over to UB to complete my final year.

lazyness has caused me

2007-08-22T18:37:00.000+08:00

There are many things that I want to change in life, especially my character. I have many bad habits that have caused me a lot. One of it is laziness and the other is procrastination. These two bad habits are what I wanted to kick off so badly, but each time I fail time and time again. Why do these two bad habits seems so difficult to shake it out of my system? I want to soar high in whatever I do. It seems very distance to the finish line time and time again. This so near yet so far feeling can only blame it on myself because I did not do well for my part. I did not do well enough that I can reach the goal. The only person that I can blame for not able to get to the goal I set is myself. I'm not hardworking enough, I'm lazy and likes to procrastinate a lot. But I want to change. Why can't I remove these bad habits out of me? I want to reach my goals. I want to be success and soar into the sky like an eagle..........

Envy

2007-08-17T09:42:00.000+08:00

Life is full of envy. Envy people able to do things we can't, envy people can go to places we can't, envy people can be so rich and so on....... Another cousin of mine is going over to Holland to study for 6 months, and he is flying off tomorrow. The only thing I can do is envy, and nothing else. Even though I'm eager to go to overseas to study, but I can't because it costs too much. My mum has told me "You need not think about going overseas to study." Haiz.... this is how life is, the cruelity of reality. Sometimes I don't understand why the things that I yearn for so much it is so difficult to get it. I yearn to go overseas to study, but this dream may not even come true at all. I yearn to do well in my business, but it seems like there is still a big gap I need to close down on to reach it. Why dreams that I want to achieve seems so near yet it is so far away? Is God playing with me? Nothing seems to be smooth going in my life, there is always hipcups somewhere in the road that I travel. There is always barriers that I need to overcome, and these barriers seems never ending. It is sometimes very tiring to cross one and down the road not far you see another. Why can't some parts of my life be smoother or be easier to reach my goals?

poor results

2007-07-30T22:10:00.000+08:00

I'm so sad....my MGQ 301 tests are not doing very well. I did study but why my grades are getting bad to worst. Why is it like this? What is happening to me? My first test I got 17 out of 25. Now, my second test I got 14 out of 24. I have better confident and preparation than the last test, but why am I getting this result? I not satisfy with it, and am very angry with myself. How can I get this result? I cannot get this result because I did study hard for it. I cannot afford another C in my grade otherwise my GPA will be pull down. I can only get minimum Bs for all my courses to pull up my GPA. I want to get B+ for both of my courses for this half of the semester. I CANNOT AFFORD A ANY C GRADE. I WILL DIE IF I GET C+, C OR C-. I NEED TO GET AN A, A-,B+,B OR B-!!!!!!!!!!!!! I DON"T WANT GRADES THAT IS LOWER THAN B-!!!!!!!!!!!! ARGH...................................................................................................................I WANT GOOD AND BETTER GRADES!!!!!!!!!

22/7/07

2007-07-22T20:46:00.001+08:00

It has been a month since I have blogged. Recently have been busy with school work. Mid-term examination is around the corner. On Tuesday having COM240 exam and on Wednesday there is MGQ301 test. Next week 31st need to hand up a project and an assignment. There is so much to do yet little time. I have my own personal stuff to do as well; moreover, I have not been meeting the expectation. Haiz....so many things on hand plus so many things to think about and to complete. Maybe if there is a few of me, I guess I will have do a better job. There are many things on my mind as well, but have not have time to work them out. I'm not that sort of person who tells others about my problem so I guess I would have to just figure out myself.
Today on Chinese newspaper I saw Kelvin Lim- Liyana,Roslyn and Priyanka, COM 125 lecturer- it was about the online blogging that goes on "live." I guess I will bring the paper to let them to take a look. I think Rosalyn will read the article and tell both of them what it is about as it is written in Chinese. :-)
I have finishing reading Harry Potter book last night. I did a continuous reading for around 12-13hours. Of course I did go to the toilet, eat and bath. The story was nice but at some parts I got confuse. Overall, is not bad as the story is interesting. I quite like the ending even though it is a fairy-tale ending. I like the part when Harry met up with Dumbledore to talk about the things that had happen. Rowling did a good job by bring the story a bit further to 19 years later to let the reader know how Harry, Ron and Hermonie were living. But a pity that, she never mention about what their jobs are. Its a nice ending of good triumph the evil. haha.....

Six weeks courses

2007-06-21T09:50:00.000+08:00

These six weeks have been tough. Six weeks and 2 modules have been a race against time. Rushing is the word to describe these six weeks. Rushing to meet deadlines for assignments and projects. Mid-term exam happens after 2 weeks after school starts and final exam is next week. Argh............everything happens so fast that there is no time to settle down and get into situations. There is even no time to take a breathe and relax. Everyday is lived by rushing. I can't imagine the next six weeks with another 2 modules that I have to take for this summer semester. Will the next six weeks which is starts in the 1st week of July be the same as these six weeks? Hopefully not and hope that it will be better. I hope that I will not have to live the next six weeks in a rush again.

busy semester

2007-06-08T21:55:00.000+08:00

Argh.....so many projects and assignment to do. The deadlines and midterms are so close to each other. These few weeks have been rushing for assignments and projects deadline. This is really crazy. It feels like there is no time to catch a breath. They are all so close to each other and I think many of us are like superman and supergirl multi-tasking many things at a go. This is so bad.....

Guess who I saw today? My very old secondary school mate. We were very good friends, but something happen and we did not keep in contact for many years. We were so shock to see each other; however, we did not talk to each other because I just walked away like that. I guess I was too tired; therefore, I reacted this way. Hopefully I can see him again to chat up with him. No matter how tired I am, I will chat up with him when I see him again. Seeing him again reminds me the days that we had......

Idiot Laptop

2007-05-25T18:54:00.000+08:00

Argh......this idiot laptop seems to been giving me some problems. When I'm on the net, and all of a sudden the laptop got me kick out of the wireless plus when I want to re-enter into the wireless again I can't. I had to restart the laptop again to get into the wireless. I think my laptop is going a bit "kuku." I guess I better ask Dell to bring this laptop back to check as it is still under warranty. Argh.......IDIOT LAPTOP..........or maybe I should sayang it more :-/ Can't imagine a laptop will bully me : ...(

1st week of school

2007-05-23T16:04:00.000+08:00

School have started. The lecturers for the 1st half of the semesters are very strict. They are very particular about timing. That would be terrible to many students who come late often. I didn't quite like the COM 202 lecturer because her eyes are so scary. She seems like she is going to eat a person especially when one looked at her eyes from the side view. She practically stares and goes up to the person when he/she is late. Scary right? COM 205 lecturer is strict, but he is more friendly unlike the COM 202 lecturer. I guess COM 205 would be more fun than COM 202. The worst part of both is that the project group memebers cannot be decided by us. Oh my God.......can't imagine who I will be group with. :-X

School is starting soon

2007-05-18T11:51:00.000+08:00

Another 3 days of rest and school is starting. 2 weeks go by so fast. Haiz....These 2 weeks nothing "big" happen in my life. Passes very ordinary and fast through the days. I guess the coming semester would be better and not that hectic. I have to do even better for the coming semester because my last semester grades not very good. 1B+, 2Bs, 1B-, 1C+......no 'A's, so sad. :-( Never mind I will buck up this coming semester. I can achieve better results because I believe I can. Yes!

2nd week of holiday

2007-05-12T12:16:00.000+08:00

Entering into my 2nd week of holidays..... During this week, nothing much happen. Me and my usual life. Nothing interesting to talk about. These few days have been sleeping late and waking up early, and spending time with my grandma. How I wish that I can go on a holiday, but haiz....have no money. If I can go on a holiday, I would go to Tibet. That is my dream place to go to. Many people around my age would want to go to a developed country. For me, I like to go places that aren't that develop because the scenery and culture there would not have western cultures mixed into it. The best way to Tibet is to do back packing. Through back packing, one can really see and experience the uniqueness of the country. The people, their lifes and the strong buddhist influence is something that we can't experience in the developed countries we are living now. Tibet would be a good place to relax and throw all worries to the back of our head; enjoying and experience the life of the people, and the culture by being part of it. I hope to go Tibet within these few years before development in the area starts. Maybe if one day I disappear from Singapore suddenly, you may find me walking on the streets of Tibet. Hahaha..... :-)

feel troubled but don't know what it is

2007-05-05T19:37:00.000+08:00

Have you ever feel troubled but do not know what thing is troubling you? This is how I feel now. I feel there is something that I need to do, and solve, but I can't put my finger on it. I don't know what is troubling me, and feel very disturbed by it. Something is pressing down against my heart, and can't figure out what it is. This kind of feeling is terrible as I'm not sure what it is that makes me so unhappy and trouble. It seems to me that there is many things in me that needs a path to get it out, but it is just stuck there. This could be that I have hide and surpress many things inside me that when the feeling comes, I couldn't figure out what is the thing that needs attention. I do need to look for a way to get all these things out of me so that I wouldn't feel that terrible.

One more exam paper to go

2007-04-26T18:50:00.000+08:00

One more exam to go and I will be done with. Yah! After exams, I have more things to do. I have to constantly push and pace myself if I want to reach my goals that I have set. I need to put in 1000% of hardwork and 2000% of actions, only like this I can move to a greater height. If not, I will still remain the same and never move on. I DON'T WANT THIS TO HAPPEN, I DON'T WANT TO REMAIN WHERE I AM NOW. Life would be even harder, and would be facing more barriers. But never mind, I rather to have a harder life now and enjoy life later. I don't want the other way round which many youngsters are doing. I would rather suffer now and enjoy life later. I know I can do it, and would require great effort to do it. I need to overcome many things in order to achieve my goals. One of the greatest enemy that I'm facing is myself. I need to break through this barrier, and I believe things will start to fall in place after I have overcome myself.

living 2 lifes

2007-04-12T10:49:00.000+08:00

I finally understand why some people smoke or drink. Don't get me wrong I don't do any of those. I think they do that to somewhat put things that are bugging them at the back of their mind for a moment. That is how I feel sometimes when I'm in school.
I feel that I'm living in 2 worlds - the reality and the'virtual' world. I feel that when I'm in school with my classmates, I'm like in a world of 'virtual' where I puts away with the things that is bothering me. Maybe I don't want to show them that I have things on my mind. When I stepped out of school, this is where I have to face the reality. The problems that are bugging me needs to be solved, and needed solution for it. It feels like living in 2 seperate worlds. At times like this feels tiring, not physically, but mentally tired. There are many things in reality that I need to face, and to complete it. Handling 2 things at once is not easy, but I need to learn how to balance it well. Fear that I have must be confronted in order to break down barriers; furthermore, bring me to a new height. Jia you, I can do it!

I met someone today

2007-04-07T15:43:00.000+08:00

Today seems to be a normal day for me. I went for a hair cut, and it wasn't oblivious because the hair stylist did not cut much for me. After the hair cut, I had my lunch and took a bath. Rested and watch TV for a while then I went down for a walk. I went to rent VCDs to watch plus went to Coffee Bean to buy a coffee to drink as I love coffee. Don't ask me why I love it because I just simply love to aroma and taste of it. Of course coffee from places like Coffee Bean, Starbucks, etc are more expensive. Long long drink once is ok. While walking back to my grandma's place, I saw my secondary school ex-boyfriend. Both of us got a shock when we see each other, but after so many years plus both of us have changed, I don't know he still recognize me. He seems to have grow bigger in size, and I guess the 2 ladies that were with him--one is the girlfriend,and the other one is the future mother-in-law. If he still recognize me, I guess it won't be good to say hi to each other as his girlfriend may not like it. He seems good. I wish him all the best with his girlfriend, and hopefully they will tie their knot soon--if I'm not wrong, they have been dating for a long time.

It's Good Friday today

2007-04-06T23:44:00.000+08:00

Today is a holiday for everyone. For me, it is just a normal day because I do not have school on every Fridays. Yesterday, I met up with my ex-collegues for dinner at Brewekez(I think this is how it is spelled). We had an interesting night with fun talks, and there were lots of laughter. They called 2 jugs of beer, but I did not drink as I can't drink at all. I did take a sip to try out how it taste like, and I didn't quite like the taste. The food there was nice, but the price of food and drinks were a little too expensive. We had games, and some psychological tests. I met Chong Wei's boyfriend, and he seems quite nice. They have started not long ago, so.....I guess they would need sometime to know each other; furthermore, to know how will the relationship goes. I hope that their relationship will be a success. :-) I really had fun last night...... ;-) ,but back to reality there are still so many things on hand that need to be completed. :-(

sick not yet recover

2007-04-02T20:34:00.000+08:00

I have not recover from my cough yet. Haiz....already sick for so long liao, and still have not recover. Worst of all is my whole family is sick plus my sis who is sick for the longest of all went for a x-ray. The x-ray shows that she has lung infection. She has also done a blood test which results will be out on wed to know the type of virus. If serious, she would has to be hospitalized. Hopefully she will be alright. I also hope that I will recover soon, and will not fall sick again.
I have so much things to do; need to finish my communication assignment which is due on Thursday plus need to finish the marketing power point by tomorrow. There is so much things to do including the business that I'm doing. I need to reach a certain quota that I had set for myself because I want to succeed in this business. I want to succeed in this business because I want to buy back all my time so that I can enjoy and relax. I don't mind that the road now is tedious and tough. I want to buy back all this time so that I can spend more time with my family, plus need to earn a lot of money so that I can bring my family overseas for tour. Hopefully I can bring my family to tour the around the world. I believe I can, and I will work hard to fulfill these goals of mine. YES, I CAN!!!

So many things to do

2007-03-22T14:23:00.000+08:00

There is so many things to do. I have to do my school assignments, and do my 'part-time business.' So many things to do, but so little time. I do feel tired; however, knowing that I can reach my goals is much more exciting. In Singapore, there are many MLM companies. However, choosing the right company would be very important. Many Singaporeans try to avoid when MLM distributors approach them to talk about the business plan. I find that Malaysians can do many times better than Singaporeans in MLM. This is because life in Singapore is very comfortable that many do not want to change. The Malaysians on the other hand are more willing to change their life with their own hands, and not let fate control their life.Therefore, Malaysians distributors are better than Singapore distributors. I'm a Singaporean myself, and find that Malaysians Chinese are more hardworking; furthermore, willing to fight to have a better life. I find Singaporeans, mostly, resign themselves to fate and the comfortable life that we are living. This comfortable lifestyle has made many not willing to change the kind of life that many are having as a tougher road is needed to walk before reaching the better lifestyle that many only hope that it will drop from the sky. There is only a minority of Singaporeans willing to work hard and fight for the life they wanted. Do you want to be in the minority or the majority, decide for yourself.

Back from KL and inspire to have new drive of force

2007-03-20T08:40:00.000+08:00

The KL trip is really very fun, exciting, emotional and unbelieveable. In this trip, I learned a lot and have new directions plus goals in my life. A new drive force is injected into me that make me want to achieve the goals in my life. The most inspiring thing is the checks that my uplines have taken. One pair took a profit sharing of RM$43,000, and the other pair took a profit sharing of RM$306,000. Can you imagine that? That would be equalvant to a person working for 10-20years. These two pairs are taking only bonus, and who can one shot take that much bonus for a year. I believe most of us are not able to get it. This bonus does not include the monthly income that they earn. Imagine the monthly income + the bonus would be a lot of money. They get this through hardwork, and by helping a lot of people to get back their health; furthermore, they help many to become successful. They are not working class people, but are bosses of their own. Their persistant and their willingness to help people have given them the 6 riches which is health, beauty, time, friends, money and self-actualization. All these 6 riches can't be achieve through working life or traditional business. These 6 riches can be achieved through FLP, this is the only way to ahieve the 6 riches in life. In these 6 riches, there isn't any one riches that we are able to give up of not having it. I must get these 6 riches in life, and I believe I will get it.
My new goal is to qualify for profit sharing in 2009. I am not afraid of hardwork. I'm not afraid that the road ahead would be tedious. I am not afraid that I will face many rejections and many cold water. I believe that I will achieve it. I will go on stage on 2009 to get the profit sharing check. I will and must achieve it. This is my only hope because I want to fulfill my childhood dream. Profit-sharing is my only hope, and I must get it this profit-sharing every year from 2009 onwards. I must must must get the profit-sharing check in 2009. I must qualify for it. I believe I can do it, and will be qualify for it. Yes, I can.

Going KL tomorrow and haven't recover from sick

2007-03-16T18:42:00.000+08:00

I'm going KL tomorrow for an event, and will be back on Sunday night. I don't know how late it will be when I reached Singapore. Furthermore, I'm having classes on Monday. Luckily, my class starts in the afternoon so I can sleep a little later, and revise for my quiz.
Haiz....already sick for nearly a month, and I have not fully recovered. I still cough now and then, not much, but it is frustating especially when I'm sleeping. It really disturbs my sleep, and cause me not to sleep that well into the night. Tonight must sleep early because tomorrow must wake up very early in the morning. I guess that would be around 5am. Hopefully I will not be waken by my coughing. Hopefully I can have a good night rest for tonight. :-)
How I wish going to KL trip will pass fast so that I will be back in Singapore again because when I'm sick, I don't feel like travelling, and would like to stay at home. I have to take it as a short break away from my studies. Haiz....hurry up, and be over and done with.

My classmates have the same thinking as me

2007-03-12T22:30:00.000+08:00

When I was going back with my classmates, we chatted on the bus. I mentioned about my cousin going to overseas to study, and I am very envious of her. She is really lucky that she is able to study overseas as those who yearn to study overseas don't have the chance. My classmates have the same thoughts of going over to US side on our last semester to complete our studies. But our parents disapprove of it. It was probably the money matters that we may not be able to go over. But I really do hope to go over there to complete my studies, I'm not greedy as I would like to go over for one semester only. Just one semester will do, to experience a different life between America and Singapore which I have been staying for the past 23 years. However, my parents will never understand the reason that I wanted to go over to States to study so badly. To them, studying in Singapore and in the States is the same. I know that in my heart studying and living in the States and in Singapore is totally different. I hope to go over, just one semester only, just one semester. I wouldn't ask for more,but for just one semester to go over there to study. I don't mind completing as many modules in Singapore so that the cost of going over to the States to study would be lower. Will my parents, especially my dad allow? I really don't know. I really do hope that they would change their mind. Thinking about yesterday when I went to the airport to see my cousin, I wish that the person is me going off to study in America. I really do envy her. She is really lucky because there are many people who want to go, but aren't able to go. Dad Mum, I don't ask for much, just 1 semester will do and I will be very satisfied. Haiz....please approve to let me go for just 1 semester will do liao lah.....

Envious that my cousin could go overseas to study

2007-03-11T19:37:00.000+08:00

Today, I went to sent my cousin off at the airport as she is going over to America to study. Sitting there looking at her, her friends and relatives who went to see her off makes me envious about her. I have always wanted to go overseas to study, but I never got the chance because my dad don't allow;furthermore, my family is not rich. I really am envious about my cousin able to study overseas. The kind of experience studying overseas and here will surely be very different. I had request to my dad about letting me go over to US in my last semester as currently I'm studying the course from University at Buffalo. Apperently, I don't think my dad allows, but hopefully he could change his mind about it. Whenever, I bring up this topic, he will talks about family and other things. I guess he will never understand about why I want to go overseas to study as he always wants us to stand in his position to think and feel. I guess he will never put himself in my shoes to think about how I feel and understand the reason for the things I want to do. I do feel like crying at this moment because I guess no one really know how I feel and stuffs. Most of the time, I have to understand others' feeling and put myself in their position. I don't think there is someone who really put themselves in my shoe, even the closest people around me never really do that. I know they care for me a lot and I do appreciate that. I really hope to study my last semester over at US, and I really envy my cousin that she can go. I hope that she will know and appreciate that how lucky she is that she can study overseas. I'm really envy her.....

Wrongfully accuse

2007-03-11T09:57:00.000+08:00

I am been accuse of spoiling the bathroom door in my house, which I did not. This happen last night, after my mum finish washing the bathroom and I wanted to use it. When I was about to shut the door, the door spoil. As the bathroom door in my house is a foldable door, one side of it fell down.

This is the picture of the spoil door. I really never spoil the door. One side of the folding door fell by itself, as in the picture. I don't know why it fell but at that time I was shock that the door suddenly fell apart. It wasn't me who spoil the door. :...(

what a saturday

2007-03-10T15:17:00.000+08:00

This saturday is like any other saturdays that I had. Boring as usual, I neeed to do something to change my life to make it more interesting. How I wish I can go holiday and someone can sponsor the trip. I think that would be in my dreams. Talking about dreams, I dreamt a lot quite recently in my sleeps. I don't understand what is it about and can't remember it.
I saw Soon Hwa on Wed morning at the traffic light waiting to cross the road. I think beside him is his wife. It has been a long time since I had talk to him and see him. He didn't see me as he was in the car. Seeing him reminds me of the past that we used to have. Don't be mistaken that he was my ex-bf. He isn't, he is a very good friend that I had. I miss the times we had together and miss him a lot.That reminds me, that next month is his birthday, and must remember to send a message to him next month. :-) Bro, i do miss u a lot, hope that we can meet up one day to chat and do some catching up.

Argh....I have not recover yet

2007-03-07T20:42:00.000+08:00

It has been 2 weeks now from the day I felt sick. I have not recover yet, and have been coughing badly. I have been drinking a lot of water, and it doesn't seem to work. I had went to see a doctor; furthermore, finished up my medicine. Yet, I have not recover. Its so troublesome to be sick, and is frustrating because the coughing disturbs my sleep. In fact, this is irriating as I lose sleep because of the disturbing cough.
Tomorrow I'm having my marketing mid-termed exam. I have to go and study now, otherwise I will have to stay up late to study. I find myself very poor thing because I'm still sick and need to study for my exam...... :-(

Yeah its Friday

2007-03-02T09:53:00.000+08:00

Its Friday! I like Fridays the best. But I have so many homework to do. Haiz...... but still Friday is the best because going into the weekends. I have to prepare for a mid term and 4 tests next week. Even though studying is tough but it is still better than working because of the freedom. Moreover, now I don't have school on Fridays so can rest and relax. haha....

My cough got worst, argh........

2007-02-26T18:07:00.000+08:00

Woo.....my cough got worst..... Haiz.....I still have to go to school and have cough & flu. Argh.....very xin ku leh.... somemore still need to study and watch online lecture. Waaaa......hurry up okie leh so I can eat potato chips and cheese balls.....

What a Sunday

2007-02-25T21:17:00.000+08:00

Guess how I spent my Sunday today? I woke up at 8plus in the morning, and went to the temple till 12pm. After that went home and sleep for 1-2hours then bath. Finish my bath, start doing homework and my relatives came for CNY visiting. They reach here around 3.30-4pm and gamble here. Around 5.30pm went for dinner at a coffeshop, later on went to my cousin's house for visiting as she stays in Toa Payoh too. Came back home, help my mum to pack the house then finish my marketing homework, and got all my homeworks print out for submission.
I still have school work haven't finish yet that is watch online videos and to revise for my math mid-term which is the coming wed and the statistic test which is on the coming thursday. I haven't even read my COM217 and 225 yet. So many things haven't do yet...... want to cry liao lah......

I'm sick......

2007-02-23T13:27:00.000+08:00

Haiz.....I'm sick again. Cough and flu......went to see a doctor yesterday and now have to take medicine. :-( I think once I recover, I need to go jogging every week to build up my immune system. Exercising is a great way to de-stress and to bulid immune system. I guess this time when I'm sick is because I'm ate too much heaty stuff. Haiz......take medicine lor........

Restart labtop

2007-02-22T11:55:00.000+08:00

I had restart my labtop. Only after restarting the laptop, I can access my email. Finally. I still don't know what happen to it. Anyway now that it can work, I'm satisfy. Haiz.....sometimes I really don't know what to do when something happen to the laptop. It is like the laptop is throwing temper, and I have to sayang it then it will listen to me. Sometimes it feels like taking care of a kid........Haiz.........

Don't know why?

2007-02-22T11:49:00.001+08:00

I try to access to my email account and the login of my school account. It came out error everytime. What is wrong with it. It feels frustrated that I can't access it. I want to read the mail. Argh......... who can tell me what to do with it? It is really frustrating when not knowing what the problem is, and not able to solve it. What is wrong with it? Is it the other party's server fault or is my labtop having problem? I really don't know. But, I can log in to blogger, and type this post. So what is the problem. My labtop or the other party's server problem? This is very funny and frustrating at the same time. ARGH..............................

CNY is here and over

2007-02-21T16:05:00.000+08:00

Its fast, CNY holidays are over. Time really flies fast. Before CNY, many people are busy with house cleaning, buying CNY clothings, etc. When it comes, it over so soon. Haiz....my CNY every year for the past 24 years is the same except everyone is growing older. My older cousins are married and some even have their own children. That's really fast. But this also means more ang pows to collect. :-) This does not necessary means more money can be collected because these few years the economy hasn't be that good. Our ministers said that economy have been better, but this is for the whole country. As for the people, not everyone having a better economy. Moreover there will be an increase in GST..... In my opinion, the rich S'poreans are getting richer and the poor S'poreans are getting poorer. The middle-class people is suffering the most because they are neither here nor there.
My CNY for this year is to complete assignments and finish watching the online lectures that I have to accumulate. The thing is I have not completed all of it yet.Still have to rush to finish it. Luckily, I have a week break to complete it. Otherwise, I have to do all this by staying up late.
Jia you!!!! :-)

5 days to CNY

2007-02-13T23:28:00.000+08:00

This week is a busy week for me. There is so many things to do. I have 3 tests this week. AAAAHHHHH......still have project work that need to be completed on my part. At times, I wish that I can be lazy for 1 or 2 days......but can't. Tomorrow is Valentine's Day, and I will be all alone by myself. I don't have boyfriend after the 2 puppy love that I had in my secondary school days, but never mind. I still prefer single life because it has more freedom. I do admit that at times I do hope that there is someone special that I could relie upon as sometimes I do feel tired.Haiz.......in relationship or single do have pros and cons, this depends on how a person sees it. I have thoughts about going to somewhere for holiday where no one is able to find me, and somewhere no one knows about me. Because sometimes being around friends, family and relatives can be tiring; moreover, I'm more of the person who keeps my feelings inside me. Going for holiday alone would be good to let myself have bigger personal space and to do deep thinking......