Two days to Christmas!!!! Yah! It will be a break for me from work, and I am looking forward to it. I think during this long weekend I want to catch a few movies - 3D Avatar, Chipmunks 2 and Sherlock Homes. I am not sure whether am I able to catch all 3 movies, but I hope to catch one of it. These few days work is kind of slow because it is a festive season, and it is the year end period. Therefore, I am able to go home early which also means that less overtime. However, I need to prepare myself for the next year because I guess that will be the time when things start picking up. This means that I may need to work overtime, but I really hope that I can end work on time everyday. I also hope that the company will pay me better or even pay me overtime as I feel that I am being taken advantage. I feel that I am working for free every time when I need to work overtime. I also feel that I am terribly underpaid because I am holding a Degree, and with a peanut salary I have such a heavy work load. I feel that they should employ someone with a Diploma instead as the other 2 persons who are in the same position as me are Diploma holders. I'm not asking for much, but at least be fair to me by giving me a comparable salary to my Degree. ><

Through my observation of this company, I find that the turnover of my position is the highest because the 3 of us are all hired this year. Furthermore, the work load is quite heavy. I am not surprise of the high turnover rate because the position that I am in does not have good benefits. There is no pay or off in lieu for overtime, and the expectations are high. Seems like not many have worked pass 2 years in this position. One of the biggest reason is lots of personal time is sacrifice - meaning no time for family, friends and self. This kind of work life does not seems healthy to me in a way. I think something should be done, but I have no power because I am just a small 'prawn' in this company.

4 more days to Christmas! Wondering why am I looking forward to this day? The answer is because it is a public holiday, and I do not need to go to work. Yah! Entering the work force once again has made me missed the days in school. The carefree life is what I missed the most as no one will stick their nose into the things I do. I will describe a work life as a serving a sentence in jail, but it is a paid jail term because people are monitoring the things you do. In addition, one can't do what they want or leave at the time they desire. Everything that you do needs to go through the hierarchical sequencing before it is approved. And this includes applying for a day's leave. Since I'm at this topic, it strikes me that from the day we are born we are being controlled. When we were younger, parents or elders are there to tell us what we can or can't do. Then as we grow up, school's rules and class's rules are the ones that control our actions. It seems like no matter at what age we are in, our actions are always been watched by others. Seems like a sad thing to you? To me, it is kind of sad because there is no real freedom.

Doubts exist in everyone of us. The job that I'm in has made me question myself numerous times - "Am I suitable for this job?" "Is this what I really want?" "What is the thing I really want in life?" " What kind of job do I really want?" Till now, I have not found the answer to all my questions. However, I do firmly know that this is not the kind of job I wanted. I want something where my time is flexible, enabling me to write & take beautiful photos of the things I experience and allowing me to travel to different places to share with people the cultures of the countries. I am the type of person who wants to experience cultures, places and food with my senses. Will I ever get this kind of job? I am not sure about it, but I believe that what I want I will achieve it in the end. :)

Third week of work, and I have fallen sick. I can't imagine this is happening. Have I been working too hard or have I been taking too many 'heaty' stuff? I do not have the answer to this either. I started by having sore throat on Tuesday followed by flu and cough the next day. I have not seen a doctor yet because I want to complete the three days of general orientation which started on Wednesday. I think if I am not well on Monday I will be taking medical leave. However, it is very unfortunate that the company will take it as an unpaid leave because I am not a confirmed staff. Since I am on this topic of work, this whole week I have been working overtime. The only day I am home early is today as I ended work at 7pm plus. Even though I am sick, I have been working overtime as well because I need to help clear some work. The best part for this is I am not paid for doing overtime. To think of it now, I am kind of being taken advantage, and am doing free labour after my office hour. Haiz..... Just three weeks of work, and I have seen the ugliest side of this department I am working in. I really can't imagine how long am I able to stay in this job. Even though many are envious that I have gotten into this hotel, but it is not as good as it seems. Being in this hotel can be associated with a SIA stewardess who is seen by many as glamorous, but it is not that true after at all.

Time flies fast, and it is already the last day of November. This is my fifth day at work, and it is also a day closer to the end of my honeymoon period. I have not really had a feel of the real tasks that I'm supposed to do yet. However, I guess that after the honeymoon period I will then have a feel of the real things. Currently, I am being attached at different departments to understand how they operate and how the department is linked to mine. It is kind of interesting to understand how a hotel actually operates. The appearance of a hotel may look very glamorous, and if you think that the people working inside are cool then you are wrong. This is because what runs on the inside is not reflected on the exterior. Many sweats, hard works, coordinations, etc are required to build the image and service standards of the hotel. This really gives me an insider into the hotel industry. The orientation also gives me the privileges to visit the different rooms and suites which are really beautiful. From the past days of orientation, I can now understand the effort that is put into maintaining the image of this hotel.

Recently, changes have been quite drastic after I started working on Monday. Adaptation to the new environment, new job scopes, new people, new working styles, etc. Although I am still going through orientation, I can feel the pressure and stress even before I started doing my actual tasks. This is because of the department that I am in - the sales department. This job is fast pace and requires great amount of accuracy. I hope I will be able to meet their work standards and the pace. During the days I have been at work, I missed my first permanent job because it gives me freedom and space to breathe. My position for this current job is as a sales administrator where I am help the sales people to do proposals, contracts,etc. It is really an admin base job as I will be in the office 95% of the time, and sitting in front of the computer. The worst thing is that I am not allowed to use the Internet unless it is work-related. I am not sure how will I survive, and how long I can stay in this job because I am not really the kind who likes to be in a office for a long time. This could be because of the first job I had which allows me to roam around. I am really missing it now while I am typing this. My first job was as a QA technician grants me access into the production area. I roamed around the production area a lot because there were materials that needed checking, and I was also in-charge of pest control which grants me a few hours to walk around the whole factory once every two weeks. It was great especially when I needed to take a breather during work. However, this current job makes me doubt I can do such things. Somehow, I feel that I am being caged in, and have no place to escape. I am not sure why I am feeling this way, but this is how I feel. This is my first permanent job after my degree; however, this is not the job I wanted. Under this current situation, I guess I have no choice, but to accept and stay in this job in the mean time. Where I will be or what lies ahead for me is still be a mystery to me at the moment. Now, the main thing is doing my job well and meeting up to my superiors' expectations. I hope my boss, superiors and colleagues will treat me with patience, and be good & well to me. I think this is what I can ask for now.

Hahaha......I know it has been long since I last updated my blog. Today, I'm kind of free to write so here goes. :)

The few months I was working as a temp. The job was rather admin based, and was working for a VWO(Voluntary Welfare Organization). They run courses so I was there to help in the back-end work. I think the only job scope I enjoyed doing was getting refreshments for the participants as that was the only time where I can go out during office hours, and not sit in front of my computer. After my temp job ends, I continued to keep myself busy with the volunteering work at APEC during the Leaders' Week. This is currently till on-going, and my duty will end this Friday. These two weeks I having been waking up very early because of the event as I have chosen the morning shift which is the 8am timing. But because I need to get the security pass, I have to reach there even earlier. So for the past 5 days I have been waking up at 5.15am so that I can get there by 7am to get the security pass. I was tired out on the first day because there was lots of walking to do, and because of this my legs' muscle were very sore. However, I have to admit that it is a good exercise because many of us were literally walking and standing for long hours. What is next after this volunteering work? I am not very sure yet, but I will definitely continue looking for jobs. During the time between after this Friday to being offered a job, I guess I will treat it as a resting period for me so that I can be ready for the next challenge ahead of me.

I need to tell myself to stay positive and think positive........

Today isn't a happy day for me. I have received 2 bad news. One is I wasn't selected for a job, and the other one is I went for a job interview today which the interviewers' body language is telling me that I'm not the person that they were looking for. Haiz.....what is happening? Must I really go back to the food science industry? If I go back to my previous industry, all these 3 years of study in obtaining a Communications degree will be wasted. I don't want this to happen. I am only asking for a chance to allow me to either work in the PR, Marcom or events. Is that so difficult? Is it because my character doesn't suit these industries? I know my weaknesses, but why can't these companies give me a chance to prove myself? From the day I ended my exams, I have sent out an estimated 100-200plus resumes. Why aren't there more interviews? Why aren't there any offers given to me? I am really puzzled. Is the problem on me or what? I am somewhat frustrated because it has been so many months. Where is that job?!