On board Singapore Flyer on 21/3/08..........

I don't know what has gotten into me today. Maybe it is the work of caffeine and the stress. I got an emotion surge all of a sudden. This sudden surge of emotion made me think that it would be great if I had a boyfriend. I have enjoyed my single life for the past four years plus. I like single hood because I am not restricted. I enjoy the freedom that I have, and I do not need to answer to anyone except my parents and myself for the things that I have done. But at times, I do hope to have a partner by my side who I can depend on plus who will be able to comfort me. I know that friends could do the same thing as well. Seldom do I go to friends when I am feeling down because I don't want to trouble them. I know that my friends have their own life especially my best friend who has her own family now. Friends come to me often with their problems which I don't mind because I hope that I will be able to help them solve it. I hope that the guy who I will spend the rest of my life with would be would be my best friend as well. Haiz....would there be such a guy?
Talking about relationship, i had 2 during my secondary school days and 1 four years ago. All these 3 relationship did not last long, none lasted more than a year. The shortest I had was around a month and longest about half a year. There are 2 guys who changed me a lot. One was in secondary school which I had hurt the guy very badly and the other guy is a very very good friend of mine who I had not started a relationship with him. The guy who I hurt deeply changed a lot because of me, and this taught me a lesson that I must think through before accepting a relationship. My best guy friend who I fell for taught me a lesson that I should not have spoiled the friendship between the both of us. The most regretful thing I had done was to confess to my best guy friend that I liked him and I did certain things that kind of hurt him. This ended the friendship between me and him. Furthermore, it had made me become very passive when it comes to love plus I did not dare to accept good male friends who I know as a boyfriend because I don't want to ruin the friendship that had been built. It made me realise that friendship is more important than BGR, andthat is the reason I have not enter into a relationship. The other reason I have not enter into a relationship is because there isn't anyone at the moment. Many has asked when would I find one. My answer to you is "I have leave it to fate."

"Its better to have love and lost than never to have loved before." Those who have watched the movie Leap Years would be familiar with this phrase. This movie did not touched me like it have for many others. However, I find myself somewhat similiar in the character Li-Ann before she met Jeremy. The part where her mother said that she was already 24 and have not has a boyfriend. I am somewhat in that stage where my parents and grandma have asked me when I'm going to find a boyfriend. Furthermore, I'm turning 25 this year. This movie made me reflect on certain things in life. Choosing between the guy that you really love and the guy who loves you more than you love him. This is a tough choice for everyone. For me, this movie is somewhat another fairy tale story. This movie is telling people to go after the love of your life so that you would not live in regret. But in reality, how many can be like the main characters in many of the love movies? I do not have the answer to the question. I still would ask at times, will the right man really appear? Till today, it is still a big question mark for me........

I am feeling the stress falling upon me. There are so many projects and assignments to complete. The moment I see those deadlines, it immediately gave me the feeling that in the whole of March I do not have the time to breathe. This is how bad the stress is falling upon me for this month. After this month is over, the exams will be on its way. Now, it is only the beginning of March,and I have feeling extremely tried. How I wish that I can have a break. But I can't because I am holding heavy responsibility for the projects that I am handling. AHHHH........
Human relations is one big thing which must be tackle in a very tactful way. I am still learning it to this point because to handle people one has to be sensitive to the surroundings and be quick in thinking & action. I think the way I handle people can be improved much more in every aspect. To master human relation, it is a life long learning process......


I am looking forward to the school holiday and need to get out of this country & people I know badly (if i am able to). I need real peace and quite plus time for myself.........